Bayern Munich’s second 5-1 victory over Arsenal in the space of a few weeks elicited the highest number of wistful sighs on record, it has been confirmed.
The Emirates was the stage for a record-breaking spate of rueful exhalations as yet another last 16 exit in the Champions League intensified the pressure on embattled Frenchman Arsène Wenger.
Wenger and his Gunners couldn’t even muster a tantalisingly insufficient second leg rally on this occasion, crumbling like yesterday’s crumble following a red card to embattled Frenchman Laurent Koscielny.
As the farce played out before them, the Emirates faithful inadvertently belted out an all-time high level of sad oral emissions.
Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, Dave, an Arsenal fan from Arsenal, remained philosophical.
He sighed: “(Sigh)
“There’s no point talking to me, I’m just going to keep sighing.
He added: “See?”