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Liverpool’s Daniel Sturridge joins West Brom “for chance of domestic silverware”

LiverpoolWest Bromwich Albion

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Wenger ins v Wenger outs “now just one violent clash away from religious sectarianism”

Arsenal

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Everton to approach every other PL manager after Watford blame them for Marco Silva sacking

EvertonWatford

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Worms deny being eaten by Sean Dyche

Burnley

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Chelsea approach tall man on street after Peter Crouch turns them down

ChelseaStoke City

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Thousands of Arsenal fans travel up to Liverpool for Walcott’s Everton medical

ArsenalEverton

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Paul Lambert found safe and sound, appointed Stoke manager

Stoke City

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Sky Sports News to employ Haitian voodoo correspondents following Lukaku row

EvertonManchester United

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“All hail our new robot overlords,” says gracious Roy Hodgson

Brighton and Hove AlbionCrystal Palace

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“Leaving Liverpool instantly perfected my English,” claims Coutinho after stirring farewell message

BarcelonaLiverpool