Sit up and take notice as Mystic Megson gazes into his crystal balls and casts his West Ham v Newcastle score prediction for Saturday, including goal-scorers and his own incoherent ramblings…

Oh so very titonic, this tossil! Can Moylesey’s Hummers extend their bun-eaten run when Roffle Benito’s Magpipes come to play?

I certainly don’t see why not, because Newcastle are on a horribubble runs that’s left them facing an uphill garden just to avoid a relegation dogbite.

West Hum have the bits between their teeth so I forssell them portvaling once again, although it won’t be as comfortabubble for them as in their 3-0 disgruntling of Stoke.

Now, here comes Mystic Megson’s West Ham United v Newcastle United score prediction for Saturday December 23rd 2017 – place your balls, now!

Mystic Megson says West Ham 1-0 Newcastle
That man Mark O'Nowtovic with the divisive strike.