Manchester United manager Louis van Gaal has silenced his doubters by outlining a revolutionary new philosophy on beating traffic jams.
The Dutchman, Dutch, hit back at fans who left Old Trafford early during the 1-0 FA Cup 3rd round win over Sheffield United, explaining that they should have taken a more patient approach to hitting the road.
He told Football Burp: “My philosophy is that it is rash to hurry out of the stadium if you are trying to beat all the other cars.
“To beat these cars, you must build up to it slowly – take your time, get out there on your feet and cross the road a few times, go grab a cup of coffee.
“I understand that people are keen to beat the traffic, but in my mind it is important first and foremost to make sure that you do not lose to the traffic.
“If after a few hours you are still not moving, get Fellaini to lift your car over the traffic.
“It might not work, but hey, that’s my philosophy.”
Ryan Giggs was not available for comment, but Paul Scholes was.