International break so very nearly over, praise be

Last few hours of torment and anguish now upon us as world prepares to get excited about football again.

International break does this to you
This bespectacled John Heitinga lookalike couldn’t take it anymore (Image: Crosa)

Look up to the sky and yell “hallelujah!” at whichever deity it is you believe in, for international break is very almost over.

The break, for internationals, has merged with other recent international breaks to feel like one gargantuan international break in the minds and hearts of football fans around the world.

Even with all of the home nations enjoying relative success in their Euro 2016 qualifying groups, it still feels like it’s been literally forever since there was any football worth getting excited about.

That’s right, folks – literally forever. And yes we do know what ‘literally’ actually means.

Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, the guy who wrote this article confirmed that since it was Friday he planned to take an early lunch and not come back.

He said: “What about John O’Shea’s last-gasp equaliser in Germany on his 100th cap? That was pretty cool.

“But yeah, it looks like a bit of a slow news day so I’m going to get the hell out of here, maybe even grab a few beers to get me through these last few hours of football-less torment and anguish.

“If anyone needs me I’ll probably be in that place that used to have the pool table before it went all ‘gastro pub’ and started serving tiger prawns and whatnot.

“Okay, see you later.”