Tweety Camera's Twits of the Week

Tweety Camera’s Twits of the Week

Tweety Camera's Twits of the Week!Hello everyone! I’m former Liverpool and West Ham United forward Tweety Camera, and I’m a right nosy so-and-so.

All day every day, you can be sure that I’ll be scouring Twitter, sniffing out the very best of my fellow professionals’ musings like I used to sniff out goal-scoring chances, and presenting them for your delectation with the kind of ruthless efficiency that saw me net 23 times in 38 games for my native Guinea. I do so hope that you enjoy this week’s selections…

Disclaimer: The views expressed by the following Twits do not necessarily reflect my own – signed Tweety Camera, formerly of Liverpool and West Ham United

Happy start-of-summer-sort-of everyone! How have you been celebrating the return of Mr Blue Sky? Me, I’ve been sitting in the garden in my pants listening to nothing but Steppenwolf. You never know how you’re going to respond, right?

Looking forward to going on my 1st holiday of the year tomorrow. It’s been too long.

— Joe ledley (@joe16led) May 31, 2012

I know how you feel, Celtic midfielder Joe Ledley – I haven’t been on holiday for weeks. A nice getaway would be just the ticket. Going anywhere nice?


“@hazardeden10: I’m signing for the champion’s league winner.” handball, basketball or football?

— Jan Aage Fjortoft (@JanAageFjortoft) May 28, 2012

LOL! Great response to Eden Hazard’s announcement that he’s joining Chelsea, former Swindon Town and Middlesbrough striker Jan Aage Fjortoft! I remember you, you were famous for your ‘aeroplane arms’ goal celebration, weren’t you? Perhaps you can give Celtic’s former Cardiff City midfielder Joe Ledley a lift to wherever he needs to go. LOL! That’s just my surrealist sense of humour shining through again.

Breaking News: Eden Hazard caught up in long discussions with Lebron James about possible late move to Miami Heat

— Stuart Holden (@stuholden) May 28, 2012

Good one, Stuart! I know, I’ll phone Everton skipper Phil Neville, see if he’s got any good banter to chip in…

Sorry guys won’t do that again someone stole my phone!

— phil neville18 (@fizzer18) May 28, 2012

Hmmm, sorry Phil. Liverpool by the sword, die by the sword, eh? LOLOLOL!!! Anyway, did anyone see Monday’s Panorama? I couldn’t believe the levels of fascism in Poland and Ukraine, and neither could veteran Reading striker Jason Roberts…

We should make up a banner..or some really snazzy badges…maybe a logo or slogan…that will sort it!!! Racism, that’s SO..80’s!! Hahaha

— Jason Roberts (@JasonRoberts30) May 28, 2012

I’ve got it, Jason: “Let’s have your signatures placed on a treaty, or you’ll have to deal with Jason and Tweety!” What do you think? My daughter reckons it’s “jokes”. I’m not sure whether that means she likes it or not but I have enough confidence in the idea to give her the benefit of the doubt.

Anything happening in Essex / London tonight … ?

— Danny Rose (@Danny25Rose) May 28, 2012

No. LOLOLOLOL!!!! Hang on, Louis Saha’s on the line…

I dont have the voice of a notorious rapper im not born in jail from a mother black panther. I dont have the crazyness of Busta.

— louis saha (@louissaha08) May 28, 2012

Louis, are you okay?

I dont hav the creatine of 50 either not the wife of JayZ.I dont hav the kennel of Snoop orDMX either not the charisma of Massout orMalcomX

— louis saha (@louissaha08) May 28, 2012

Are you okay, Louis?

Looool dis guys suttin BEN DUTTY yfrog.com/kinqyyyj

— Nile ranger (@NilePowerRanger) May 29, 2012

What’s going on? I’m scared.

Breaking News: Hazard has failed a medical at Chelsea. They could not get his head through the door.#chelsea

— Mark Robinson (@robboma3) May 29, 2012

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!! Nice one, mate! Apparently, Hazard has failed a medical at Chelsea because…oh wait, that’s the same joke. Sorry mate.

Finally, here is conclusive proof – as if any were needed – that Everton star Tim Cahill loves things that begin with ‘Adel’…

Congratulations to Adelaide united winning and getting through to the quarter finals of the Asian champions league #class

— Tim Cahill (@Tim_Cahill) May 29, 2012

Watched the Adele 21 music doco of her at the Royal Albert Hall, wow she is amazing. I’m a massive fan #watavoice #someonelikeyou

— Tim Cahill (@Tim_Cahill) May 29, 2012

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Merry weekend, everybody!