I’m Indie Nile, innit, and my knowledge of the current indie scene is every bit as boom ting as the goals I score for Newcastle United. I’m well up on all the latest releases, you get me, so when I’m not being the official bad man of the Magpies attack I’m like always reviewing albums an’ ting, you know what I mean bruv? I’m the football Zane Lowe, innit blud.

This week I’ll be getting mash-up with new LPs from Bob Dylan, Green Day, Tim Burgess, Four Tet, Muse, Grizzly Bear, Efterklang and Flying Lotus. Check me now!

Bob Dylan – Tempest

He’s well old, innit? He’s like so old, yeah, that he blatantly always forgets what he’s singing, innit bruv? I’m talking like ninety takes a song, blud! But seriously, yeah, his latter-day renaissance shows no sign of abating, you get me? There’s like a fourteen-minute song about the Titanic, it’s mad ting blud.

Indie Nile says… Four Brrrrrups Out of Five!

Green Day – ¡Uno!

They’re even older than Dylan, bruv! Why are they still going, you know what I mean? That American Idiot album was wack, and the next one had literally the most boog lyrics I’ve ever seen. I’m not feeling this either, blud.

Indie Nile says… Two Blapses out of Five!

Tim Burgess – Oh No I Love You

He was in The Charlatans, innit? I was vibing off “The Only One I Love” from one of my uncle’s old Now That’s What I Call Music! compilations, so I downloaded their back catalogue for free innit. I hoped it was going to be all funky like Tellin’ Stories or Wonderland, innit, but it’s like country or some next ting. I can’t get all psyched up for matches on country music, you get me bruv?

Indie Nile says… One Boooooo! out of Five!

Muse

Is that like some Bond theme or some ting? No? Why would you make a Bond theme when it’s not gonna be a Bond theme, you get me blud? They want to be like Queen or some next ting, innit.

Indie Nile says… One Bluh! Bluh! Bluh! out of Five!

Flying Lotus – Until the Quiet Comes

What even is this ting, blud? I can’t even listen to this, you know what I’m saying? This probably sounds liiiive for people on some next drugs, but how are you supposed to do weights an’ ting listening to this? It’s ouuuut theeeerrrreeee, blud.

Indie Nile says… Tch, what?? out of Five!

Four Tet – Pink

This is a bit more housey, I can vibe off this. Yeah, this is quite banging. I like it when music is all like, you know, quite banging an’ ting. It’s still a bit weird though, you know what I mean?

Indie Nile says… Three Shut Up, Yeah?s out of Five!

Grizzly Bear – Shields

This is some next ting, bruv. It’s, like, trippy Jeff Buckley, you know what I’m saying? I’ve listened to this bare, you get me, and each time I’m all like BRRRRRRRRUP! BRUP! BRUP! I listen to this when I’m cotching on the substitutes bench, know what I mean?

Indie Nile says… Four Oh My DAAAAAAAAAYYYYS out of Five!

Efterklang – Piramida

They’re Danish, innit? Peter Løvenkrands is Danish too, you get me. Yeah, this is boom ting. Their film with Vincent Moon was well good too, you know what I’m saying? I was like bluh! Bluh! Bluh! Peter Løvenkrands is butters, though, so I’m-a deduct a Get Me.

Indie Nile says… Three You Get Mes out of Five!

Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaffffffffe, blud!

Tune in bare soon for more of Indie Nile’s Album Reviews!