Sunderland have confirmed their intention to dismiss new manager Gus Poyet from the Stadium of Light hot seat “ooh, let’s say sometime around March”.
The Uruguayan, temperamental, replaces the Italian Paolo Di Canio, also temperamental.
It is hoped at boardroom level that Poyet’s habit for falling out with everyone and being relieved of his duties live on television will be just the tonic for Di Canio’s totalitarian nuttiness.
At least for a couple of games or so, then they can start interviewing potential successors for when they sack him around Easter following a humiliating reversal at home to Crystal Palace.
Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, Black Cats owner Ellis Short stated his delight at getting to play god with the career of yet another hapless manager.
He said: “I can’t wait to see how the more precious factions of our first team squad react to Gus’s particular style of man management.
“Someone’s going to s*** on the floor, that’s an absolute certainty. Heck, it might even be me.
“But that’s okay, we’ll get the new guy to clear it up. I’m thinking maybe Ruud Gullit, Glenn Hoddle, or both.”
Short added that he liked the idea of having a bad guy called Gus because he’s “really into” Breaking Bad, although he’s heard good things about Game of Thrones so he might give that a go sometime.
He said: “We’ve got a sort of Game of Thrones going on here at the moment, except instead of ruling the Seven Kingdoms you have to clean your predecessor’s excrement of the walls.”