Mancini Gives Gerrard Permission To Use His Lawnmower

Manchester City manager Roberto Mancini has allowed Liverpool captain Steven Gerrard to borrow his lawnmower.
Mancini... Scarf (Image: Roger Goraczniak)

Manchester City manager Roberto Mancini has given Liverpool captain Steven Gerrard permission to borrow his lawnmower after what threatened to be a furious row between the pair ended in misunderstanding.

Gerrard, a Gemini, had interrupted a post-match interview with Mancini after last night’s Carling Cup semi-final first leg tie at the Etihad, appearing through his phlegm-riddled patois to be accusing the Italian of hypocrisy for trying to get Glen Johnson sent off just days after he condemned Manchester United’s Wayne Rooney for supposedly doing the same to Vincent Kompany.

Unable to call upon an interpreter, Mancini was visibly perplexed by Gerrard’s impassioned interjection, tentatively repeating “mi scusi?” and “errr…” a few times before shouting back at a departing Gerrard, “Yes, you can to use it!”

Mancini said: “I, errr, I think that Mr. Gerrard, either he want for to use my lawnmower, or he express disappointment that there are no octopuses in space.

“I think is more, errr, possible that he to want the lawnmower, yes? Is a lawnmower very nice, errr, electric rotary with – come si dice? – self-propelled functionality.

“The Mr. Gerrard can for to collect – I, errr, no deliver.”