Olivier Giroud’s hat-trick against Olimpiacos in the Champions League is just further evidence of his uselessness, Arsenal supporters have maintained.
The Frenchman, striking, booked the Gunners’ place in the last 16 of the competition with his triple strike, but it still wasn’t enough to win over an Emirates faithful that made its collective mind up long ago.
Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, Lance, an Arsenal fan from Islington, pointed to the fact that Giroud hasn’t scored any Champions League hat-tricks since last night as proof that he needs replacing.
He said: “Yes, he scored a hat-trick in the Champions League last night, but today’s a whole other day.
“Is he scoring one right now? I somewhat doubt it, because we’d probably be hearing all about it, such is the media’s determination to pour scorn on our long-since-established position on the matter of Giroud’s efficacy.
“If he scores another Champions League hat-trick tomorrow then maybe I’ll hold my hands up and say, okay, maybe I was wrong, but I’m pretty sure he won’t because he’s rubbish.
“Should you present me with a time machine then I wouldn’t hesitate to travel back to last night and put Theo Walcott in Giroud’s place, because then we’d have won at least 4-0.
“Useless, if dashingly handsome, French t**t.”
Steve, an Arsenal supporter from Islington, was unavailable for comment.