Gifs of Goals Grafted to Geordies’ Guts? Golly!

Fat Newcastle United fan
"This would be a great place to put Philippe Albert's chip against Man U"

Newcastle United supporters have taken it upon themselves to pioneer the invention of .gif tattoos in the wake of Papiss Cisse’s wonder-strike at Chelsea last night.

The Senegalese striker’s physics-defying punt at Stamford Bridge provoked outbreaks of shirt-removal and belly-jiggling amongst the travelling Toon Army faithful, leading in turn to a sudden and communal realisation that the only possible way to enhance this time-honoured celebration would be to fit the most abundant midriffs up with instant replay capability, a project that was subsequently drawn up under the working title Operation ESPN Teletubbies.

Since learning that the technology to wire fatties up in such a manner does not yet exist, Magpies fans have now begun experimenting with GGGGGs (Gifs of Goals Grafted to Geordies’ Guts) after the completion of a risky prototype in which the “What is Love?” scene from Saturday Night Live was successfully attached to the underside of a hippo.

Cisse’s strike will now take its place as a regular pundit on Match of the Day next season following the retirement of Alan Shearer’s volley against Everton.

However, the widespread acclaim has been met with fervent opposition by Sports Interactive Limited, who claim that the goal, along with Peter Crouch’s against Manchester City and Luis Suarez’s third against Norwich City, is evidence of either a bug or possibly a dusty hard drive.