Find yourself agog with incredulity as Mystic Megson gazes into his crystal balls and casts his Man Utd v Newcastle score prediction for Boxing Day’s game, including goal-scorers and his own irreverent take on each team…

Now that’s what I call titonic! Will Louis van Gull’s high-flying Dead Revels return to winning wise against Alain Perdu’s bubbleburst Magpipes?

The Dunchman will have been literally teething at seeing his side draw 1-1 with ten-man Villa the other day, but he’s got a wealth of attacking pie flour at his disposable.

Will he start all of Rooney, van Persil, Juan Matel and Ruddy Mel Falcao, or will he rest some of them for Spurs on Sunday? Obviously I know the answer – I’m both mystic and Megsonic.

As you can see, Joanne Cabbie scored the divisive goal in last season’s correspondenting fixture, soon before he left for PSG thus precipating prepicitating causing a massive downfall in form for Newcastle.

I simply can’t forssell them doing it again, I’m afraid, and they might even be staring at something of a comprehensive disgruntling.

Now, here comes Mystic Megson’s Manchester United v Newcastle United score prediction for Friday December 26th – place your balls, now!

Mystic Megson says Man Utd 3-0 Newcastle – Falcao (2) and the mercurious Juan Matel. You can put your balls on it!