The best jokes from England 0-1 Belgium after lifeless battle to finish 2nd in Group G

Set up last 16 date with Colombia.

Adnan Januzaj can now go read the jokes from England 0-1 Belgium after scoring the winner
SCORCHER: Januzaj (Image: Delval Loïc)

England set up a Round of 16 date with Colombia after losing 0-1 to Belgium at the Kaliningrad Stadium on Thursday night, to finish 2nd in Group G.

Both teams fielded weakened sides in an uneventful game that was settled in style by former Man Utd winger Adnan Januzaj.

Roberto Martínez’s Belgium side will now face Japan on Monday, with England taking on Colombia on Tuesday.

Should England make it past James Rodríguez and co, their reward will be a quarter final against either Sweden or Switzerland.

With the group stages now over at the World Cup in Russia, here are the best jokes from England 0-1 Belgium at Russia 2018:

If you're currently watching the football, a reminder that Grand Designs comes on More 4 in a bit, where you'll be able to see some actual paint dry. #ENGBEL

— Channel 4 (@Channel4) June 28, 2018

If it really is coming home, this is definitely the rail-replacement bus section of the journey.#ENGBEL

— Pundamentalism (@Pundamentalism) June 28, 2018



found a great feed of the #ENGBEL game pic.twitter.com/iUJ38hlWEm

— Maggy (@maggyvaneijk) June 28, 2018

Really hoping this game will end in a huge fight when both teams are trying to get more cards than the other #ENGBEL

— KN (@KN1897) June 28, 2018

The classy way to play this, would be to get three yellow cards, then get the equaliser.

— Mark Steel (@mrmarksteel) June 28, 2018


😨 Every England fan right now: "I wanted to finish 2nd anyway." #ENGBEL pic.twitter.com/udpn7qwflJ

— Sky Bet (@SkyBet) June 28, 2018



*the sound of a million ‘It’s Coming Home’ tweets being deleted*#ENGBEL pic.twitter.com/iBbkebJQRl

— Sarah (@CQEdinburgh) June 28, 2018


Are we losing to a team who are trying to lose?

— Tim Vine (@RealTimVine) June 28, 2018

Always hated international friendlies. #ENGBEL

— Chris Bailey (@c_bailey8) June 28, 2018

This game is so boring not even the VAR guys want to watch anything back #ENGBEL

— Tris Cotterill (@triscotterill) June 28, 2018

Bring them home before they can embarrass us anymore. #ENGBEL pic.twitter.com/pNYb0sGJ6L

— Royal Kingsley (@Kingsley_Royal) June 28, 2018

Don't panic. It's still coming home but by a slightly more circuitous route, with a quick stop at a service station to drop off a couple of tonight's team. They can make their own way back #ENGBEL #WC2018

— Kevin Hunter Day (@kevinhunterday) June 28, 2018

Commentator says its time for David Platt. Ridiculous, what's he going to do? #ENGBEL pic.twitter.com/3nshRLhDaa

— Gary Chapman (@TheChapmanator) June 28, 2018


"Why did you score, Adnan? Why!?"

England 0-1 Belgium#ENGBEL#OptusSport #WorldCup pic.twitter.com/1GxfQnsCWZ

— Optus Sport (@OptusSport) June 28, 2018

…and just like that, expectations have resumed normal service. #ENGBEL #EnglandvBelgium

— Tim Downie (@TimDownie1) June 28, 2018

Everyone in England is on the edge of their seats hoping Sideshow Bob doesn't score a last minute own goal #ENGBEL

— Paul Mackie (@paulmac708) June 28, 2018

The only way Eric Dier could be more aptly named would be if his name was Eric Completelyfuckinguseless #ENGBEL #oldjoke

— Glen de la Cour (leagueoneminus10) (@L1minus10) June 28, 2018



Two weeks of football’s coming home instantly ended by a Manchester United reject #ENGBEL pic.twitter.com/Iozr1H2Kw8

— James Pardoe (@JammyPar2) June 28, 2018

If you're having a bad day, just remember at least you didn't spend hundreds of euros on a flight to Russia and a very expensive ticket for a match between two teams who were trying to lose… #WorldCup #ENGBEL pic.twitter.com/Zh8iOiaClY

— Emma Coolen (@emmacoolen24) June 28, 2018

I tell ya what should be coming home, Danny frickin Welbeck x #ENGBEL

— Sally Ann Matthews (@SallyAnMatthews) June 28, 2018

Lee Dixon: "Sometimes you play you best games when you're sitting down and not playing." In that case I've just played a blinder all evening #ENGBEL

— Ghost of DJ Roomba (@GhostofDJRoomba) June 28, 2018

Think England might be over estimating the psychological power of these meetings before free kicks. No point doing them if the resukltant move lasts less time than the conference.#ENGBEL

— Danny Baker (@prodnose) June 28, 2018



Southgate: “The players who has played tonight have given everything..”

— Jessica Elgot (@jessicaelgot) June 28, 2018

Well done England for avoiding Japan till the final. #Clever #ENGBEL

— Channel 4 (@Channel4) June 28, 2018

Coming second best to people from Brussels is something the English will have to get used to.#ENGBEL #Brexit

— Darth Putin (@DarthPutinKGB) June 28, 2018


England trying to score is like a fly that's about to exit through the window… it never does

— Ria (@caeila) June 28, 2018

Just been speaking to an English bloke who bought a ticket for the World Cup final and it turns out he's due to get married the same day so if anyone's interested in getting married there's a wife going apparently #ENGBEL

— Paul Mackie (@paulmac708) June 28, 2018


Very good chance that England will lose to Colombia. Then, after all this hype, we’ll realise we just won in the last minute against Tunisia and beat Panama (ranked 55th in the world) #ENGBEL pic.twitter.com/JOGi3ax4Li

— Paul (@Masterfezza) June 28, 2018

England fans go crazy after Belguim goal 😂 pic.twitter.com/LR6mzASD9Z

— Adel Al-shehri (@AdelAlsheri1899) June 28, 2018

Football is still coming home, but it’s accidentally used Apple Maps instead of Google Maps and is currently stuck in the middle of a field that it thought was a road. #ENGBEL

— Matt Edmondson (@MattEdmondson) June 28, 2018

So. Not fussed about the result. Biggest groan of the night here came when it was announced that ITV will have the next England game too. #Hoddle#ENGBEL

— Danny Baker (@prodnose) June 28, 2018