The best Andros Townsend jokes as Newcastle agree £12m fee

Spurs had initially demanded £14m for the occasional England winger.

There was no shortage of Andros Townsend jokes as Newcastle agreed a £12m deal with Newcastle
Andros Toon-send? (Image: Allison Pasciuto)

As Newcastle United agreed a £12m fee with Tottenham Hotspur for their out-of-favour England winger, here are the best Andros Townsend jokes.

Spurs had previously rejected the Magpies’ bid of £10.5m, slapping a £14m price tag on the player – but it now looks like the two clubs have reached a compromise.

Fresh from spending £12m on Jonjo Shelvey, Newcastle are now set to lavish a similar sum on a man who’s failed to convince many fans, at least if all these Andros Townsend jokes are anything to go by…

I do not want to live in a world where Andros Townsend costs twelve million pounds

— Jamie (@JCollettCFC) January 26, 2016

I live in a world where Andros Townsend is worth more than Nani and Robin van Persie combined.

— Merry Chípmas (@CantonasChip) January 26, 2016

I'd rather spend 12mil on 240'000'000 plastic bags than Andros Townsend.

— Pete (@NicknamePete) January 26, 2016

“I'll believe Andros Townsend is signing for United when he's holding a Sports Direct plazzy bag.” #NUFC pic.twitter.com/anXWUSN2ro

— Mark Wardle (@mark_wardle) January 26, 2016

Dont get excited bout Andros Townsend, he's only coming to Newcastle to collect his Everlast jacket… #nufc

— Cola (@Percycola) January 26, 2016

Andros Townsend’s quotes about being very keen to join #NUFC are only going to get a man ‘randomly’ drug tested.

— NUFCThreatLevel (@NUFCThreatLevel) January 26, 2016

Remember when Andros Townsend cut in from the right + fired wide? It was almost as good as the time he cut in from the right + fired over.

— Who Ate All The Pies (@waatpies) January 26, 2016

Andros Townsend meant to sign for Sunderland but missed the target by 20 miles and signed for Newcastle

— Adam J Ahmed (@AdamJAhmed) January 26, 2016

Spurs and Newcastle have agreed a fee of £12m for Andros Townsend. pic.twitter.com/yfELN0kGbW

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) January 26, 2016

MI5 need to be monitoring the money-trail if Newcastle have genuinely agreed to pay £12 million for Andros Townsend.

— sam. (@SamAlexWarren) January 26, 2016

Are we signing Andros Townsend, or are we signing the Sports Direct bag he's carrying? #nufc

— Andrew (@AndrewPizzle) January 26, 2016

Daniel Levy could probably convince me to buy a PS2 for 350 quid… Getting 12 million for Andros Townsend is unreal

— Andy (@AJ3) January 26, 2016

Spurs could win the double this season and getting £14m for Andros Townsend would be their biggest achievement.

— Mid '90s Laudrup (@WarAndSetPiece) January 25, 2016

If Andros Townsend is £12 million, I'm dreading the next time I have to buy a pint of milk. I'll need to take the cash in a wheelbarrow.

— Gavin Mitchell (@gavinmit) January 26, 2016

Paying £12 million for Andros Townsend should result in a points reduction tbqh

— Carlon (@C_Carpenter14) January 26, 2016

Any football club that meets Tottenham's demand of £14 million for Andros Townsend should be liquidated with immediate effect. Incredible.

— Bowser (@darrenrix) January 25, 2016

12 milionów funtów za @andros_townsend Mają rozmach….. pic.twitter.com/UwtnPN1Nc7

— Konrad Marcelewicz (@KociarzKonrad) January 26, 2016