West Ham United have tabled an offer of one mini sausage roll for pie-eating Sutton United goalkeeper Wayne Shaw.
The bid has already been described as the Hammers’ “most derisory offer to date”, causing ripples of excitement across social media.
Sutton are believed to be holding out for their asking price of a full-sized scotch egg, the kind they sell in pubs.
Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, Slaven Bilić rolled his eyes and emitted a deep sigh.
He said: “Not this s*** again.
“How long before this pathetic excuse for a joke disappears?
“Thinking on, I’ll give you a fiver for it.”