
Spurs fire managers all the time – but nearby family-run businesses? That’s what happened when Tottenham Hotspur accidentally fired Archway Sheet Metal Works instead of manager Mauricio Pochettino.
The north London outfit, disappointing, made a right blooper when they attempted to dispense of Pochettino in the same sacrificial manner in which they dealt with Tim Sherwood, Andre Villas-Boas, Harry Redknapp, Juande Ramos, Martin Jol, Jacques Santini and somehow David Pleat on no less than sixteen non-consecutive occasions.
In a shock coincidence, Spurs missed Pochettino and accidentally set ablaze a nearby sheet metal works that they just so happened to be in a development dispute with regarding their proposed new £400m stadium.
The factory had been the final hurdle between Tottenham and their new Mecca, sparking a spate of rumours that Daniel Levy had been seen running away from the scene of the blaze holding a petrol can and chuckling to himself “in a scheming sort of way, Muttley-esque in fact”.
Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, our lawyer pointed out the thin ice we were treading on.
He warned: “You shouldn’t imply that the Spurs fire was intentional on the part of either the club or the fans.
“Thinking on, you should probably stop using the phrase ‘Spurs fire’ altogether. It’s too accusatory.
“I reckon you could probably get away with making some kind of reference to the London riots of 2011, which famously began in Tottenham.
“But not this, no.”