Sift through the best Wayne Rooney jokes that Twitter could muster as the Manchester United striker fired another angst-ridden blank against Newcastle, even having a goal disallowed for offside.

It’s now been 858 minutes of competitive football since Rooney scored for the Red Devils, which is hardly ideal for Louis van Gaal following the departures of the similarly misfiring Robin van Persie and Radamel Falcao.

Come to think of it, what is that system of his doing to them? Just chuck Fellaini up top and have done with it.

Now kick back, relax and enjoy these Wayne Rooney jokes…

Wayne Rooney pic.twitter.com/xBVieqnj8g

— Football Fix (@FBFix) August 22, 2015

Rooney's gone 858 mins in all club comps without scoring a goal. The last time Rooney scored a goal, Caitlyn Jenner was called Bruce Jenner.

— Liverpool Family (@lfc_family) August 22, 2015

Rooney and Fergie retired at the same day.

— Arsenal FC (@FFArsenal) August 22, 2015

Rooney during the game. pic.twitter.com/eTMJjSxCqZ

— Football Funnys (@FootballFunnys) August 22, 2015

Wayne Rooney to the referee: "F**k off. F**k off you s**t c**t."

— Daniel Storey (@danielstorey85) August 22, 2015

Even Rooney’s fringe growled.

— NUFCThreatLevel (@NUFCThreatLevel) August 22, 2015

Things Wayne Rooney loves: A curling shot to the far corner even if it's not on A long range pass even if it's not on Smokes Crisps Elderly

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) August 22, 2015

Rooney would be an ideal English cricket batsman.

— Paul Hughes (@Trenchboyling) August 22, 2015

Goals this season: Nicklas Bendtner = 2 Rooney + Costa + Agüero= 1 #LordForAReason

— Laura Fox (@foxhumour) August 22, 2015