10 things clubs could spend their £60m parachute payments on

Parachute… Payments (Image: Alers)

Newly agreed parachute payments dictate that clubs relegated from the Premier League will receive £60m over a four-year period; naturally, Football Burp wondered what else these clubs could/should spend the money on, because frankly they wouldn’t deserve it if they’d managed to be so careless as to go down.

After all, shouldn’t football clubs give something back to the community? Here are ten things that cost or amount to sixty million of Her Majesty’s pounds, and could therefore have been hypothetically funded by the season-long failure of just one football club…

1. Burnley’s exciting new aerospace village.

2. A new Ikea store in Sheffield expected to create up to 700 jobs.

3. 176 projects designed to improve patient care in charitable hospices across England.

4. A fund to help make households in Scotland more energy-efficient.

5. A four-year road building framework deal in Bristol that will cover new construction and reconstruction, drainage, traffic signals, fencing and barriers, paving and road markings.

6. A three-year face lift for Great Western Royal Hotel at Paddington Station.

7. A year’s worth of Brighton and Hove’s uneaten food.

8. One year’s worth of Loch Ness monster-related tourism.

9. Lots of booze, and even more booze.

10 .Lewis Hamilton’s services.

Do you know anything else that amounts the same as the new parachute payments for relegation from the Premier League? Have your say in the comments section below…