Bournemouth’s Tyrone Mings says he is “disappointed” with the FA’s decision to issue a death warrant in response to his stamp on Zlatan Ibrahimović’s head.
Man Utd star Ibrahimović was hit with a three-match ban for subsequently elbowing Mings’s head, but it is the Cherries defender who will feel most aggrieved after he was sentenced to death.
Although it is not clear whether or not Mings’s stamp on Zlatan was intentional, the FA felt they had no choice but to rally in support of one of their top draws.
A spokesperson said: “We felt we had no choice but to rally in support of one of our top draws.
“He [Zlatan] will get a three-match ban because fair’s fair, he did elbow the lad’s head, but that lad shouldn’t have trampled the ponytail of such a major star.
“It’s only right and just that he be condemned to death by the state, which we didn’t realise we had the power to order until one of our lawyers turned up a hundred-year-old document saying we could.
“Apparently the entire Royal Engineers FC squad was put to death because one of them booted an Old Etonians player in the shins.
“How times have changed.”