Ronaldo celebrates becoming first player to complete “perfect c***’s trick”

Real Madrid star rewarded with five extra days off work.

Cristiano Ronaldo has been banned for five games
C***: Cristiano (Image: Chensiyuan)

Cristiano Ronaldo was today celebrating becoming the first player in history to complete what is known by football anoraks as a “perfect c***’s trick”.

The Real Madrid star was rewarded with five extra days off work after lighting up yesterday’s Spanish Super Cup tie against Barcelona with his c***y antics.

First he celebrated a goal by popping off his shirt in order to show off his totally rock solid abs and whatnot, earning himself a booking in the process.

He then dived, earning himself a second yellow card and prompting him to shove the referee in frustration.

Reflecting on his unique achievement, Ronaldo said he didn’t realise he’d created history.

He told Football Burp: “It wasn’t until after the game that someone told me I was the first player to pop my shirt off, dive and push the ref all in the same game.

“I am very honoured and I eagerly await the botched statue in my honour.

“How will I spend my five extra days off work? I imagine I’ll probably jet off to Morocco for a series of weekend breaks.

“Other places are nice and all, but there’s just something about Morocco.”