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Mourinho: “The Chelsiest team won”

Also invents adverb 'Chelsily' to describe Arsenal's 1-0 Community Shield win.

This parked bus frustrated Mourinho
PARKED: Bus

José Mourinho yesterday rendered ‘Chelsea’ an adjective in his efforts to describe their 1-0 Community Shield defeat to Arsenal at Wembley.

The Portuguese, sulky, used the superlative form ‘Chelsiest’ in order to convey just how ‘bus-parky’ Arsène Wenger’s Gunners got while defending their slender advantage.

In a move that’s already being spoken of as being Mourinho’s latest barb and/or jibe at the Frenchman, he also invented the adverb ‘Chelsily’.

He said: “That was the Chelsiest s*** I ever did see, and I manage Chelsea.

“If you ever see me winning that Chelsily, even with Chelsea, you have my permission to come up to me and not shake my hand.

“Let’s be fair, maybe Arsène didn’t see me. After all, he doesn’t see all sorts of things.”

He added: “Yes, that was another jibe/barb.”

Wenger was unavailable for comment as he was busy trying to manoeuvre his bus out of the disastrous, previously ‘lush’, Wembley turf.