It’s the José Mourinho PSG celebration that’s sweeping the nation!
PLUS! DON’T MISS: The best Demba Ba PSG jokes after late Champions League strike
Except that it’s not, as you could clearly see at the time when he collared a succession of his Chelsea players in order to deliver frenzied instructions to protect Demba Ba’s late deciding goal against Paris Saint-Germain.
Mourinho’s frantic scavenging of the mass piley-on induced by Ba’s strike, which booked his side’s place in the Champions League quarter-finals, went apparently unnoticed by many.
Despite the increasingly Jack Dee-looking Portuguese’s explanation of his intent in the televised post-match interview, prominent online gatekeepers – and, as in some cases on Twitter, prominent online goalkeepers – reported his run down the touchline as some sort of gleeful jig.
Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, someone who looks a bit like Mourinho expressed his disappointment that we hadn’t thought this through properly.
He roared: “It’s not going to work if it’s in print, is it?
“If the readers can’t see me then there’s no point. You’ve basically just wasted everyone’s time.
“I’m amazed you can’t see what’s wrong with this. You genuinely still don’t get it, do you?
“That’s it, I’m out of here. I’ve got a gig handing out hors d’oeuvres at an Inter Milan themed birthday party.
“They’re getting someone who looks a bit like Javier Zanetti to DJ. Should be a messy one.
The Mourinho PSG celebration is to be investigated by both the Trade Descriptions Act and their recently formed competitor People Against Things Not Doing What They Should.