“I still didn’t feel like enough of a tw*t”: Pogba explains handball against Liverpool

New haircut and customised emoji launch weren't quite enough to fulfil Man Utd star's tw*ttish urges.

Man Utd's Paul Pogba strives for tw*ttishness
PLONKER: Pogba (Image: Ardfern)

Paul Pogba has opened up about his handball against Liverpool, admitting that a wacky new haircut and customised emoji launch hadn’t left him feeling like quite as much of a tw*t as he’d hoped.

The Manchester United midfielder conceded a first-half penalty in yesterday’s 1-1 draw with a movement that seemed to be a variation of his notoriously tw*ttish ‘dab’ celebration.

Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, he revealed his dissatisfaction at being surrounded by advertising hoardings promoting a small cartoon image of him that will now accompany any mention of his name on Twitter.

He said: “That’s pretty damn tw*tty, I guess, but when you’re an £89m guy like me you’ve got to reach for the stars.

“I’ve made it abundantly clear since I’ve returned to United how much I’ve learned about being a high-functioning tw*t since I’ve been away, and I just want the world to see.

“It’s my responsibility to inspire and mobilise the next generation of tw*ts, so I had to pull something sensational out of the tw*t locker.

“With my new customised handball, I think I’ve found just the thing.”