Giroud showcases new kind of Mkhitaryan that’s not offside

Enhances Man Utd star's prototype, holds New Year's Day launch party at Emirates.

Olivier Giroud scored a scorpion kick against Crystal Palace
TECH ENTHUSIAST: Giroud (Image: joshjdss)

After days spent slaving away in a laboratory, Olivier Giroud today showcased his “new-style Mkhitaryan” in front of tens of thousands of wowed onlookers at the Emirates.

The Arsenal star revealed one simple yet ingenious twist on his Manchester United counterpart’s prototype – it’s not offside.

Henrikh Mkhitaryan’s scorpion-kick goal against Sunderland was all the rage towards the end of 2016, but users complained of realising it was offside when rewatching it.

Inspired by Mathieu Flamini’s forays into the world of technological innovation, Giroud took Mkhitaryan’s formula and finally made it his own in a 2-0 win over Crystal Palace.

He told Football Burp: “At first glance the Mkhitaryan takes your breath away, but it’s hard to escape its one fundamental flaw.

“So I set to work on an alternative that not only improved upon the functionality of the original but also arrived just in time to be featured in the kind of What’s New in 2017 lists that tech mags will idly cobble together once they get back to the office.

“Presenting: the Giroud. Et voila!”

The Giroud is currently available at a premium but the price is expected to plummet the next time Arsenal are held at home by some uninspiring mid-table outfit or other.