Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain and Kieran Gibbs have been separated in a delicate medical procedure involving lots of anaesthetic and an axe.
In a move that’s already been dubbed ‘Axelade-Chamberlain’ by internet wags, the Arsenal identical twins were finally split in twain after years of conjunction.
To symbolise the duo’s newfound freedom from each other, one half has been sent to Liverpool and the other to West Bromwich Albion.
Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, one of the surgeons involved in the procedure said he’d never seen two more similar looking people in his entire life.
He said: “I’ve never seen two more similar looking people in my entire life.
“They look so much alike that I really wasn’t sure which one to swing the big axe down the middle of.
“Which is obviously both of them, but you have to understand I was extremely discombobulated by their likeness to each other.
“Conjoined twins aren’t always identical so it’s been fascinating to watch them trying to play for Arsenal in their merged state.
“I remember when one of them got sent off at Chelsea and had to drag the other off the pitch in the process, immediately reducing the Gunners to nine men.
“They lost about twelve-nil, it was nuts.”