Falcao joins Man Utd as the latest top international footballer to pledge their support to the David Moyes Foundation by filming themselves doing the ‘signing for Manchester United’ challenge.

The foundation, which is dedicated to rehabilitating much-derided football managers, has been boosted significantly by the social media success of Ángel Di María, Marcos Rojo and Daley Blind filming their own reactions to trying on United jerseys.

Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, Red Devils boss Louis van Gaal announced that procuring his autograph at the final whistle doesn’t count as signing for Manchester United.

He said: “Even if it’s on telly and immediately following the kind of catastrophic result that theoretically shouldn’t preclude you from first team consideration here, it’s still not quite the same.

“Any new signings at this football club shall be required to be of such a calibre that they’ll actually improve the team, not just maintain its current level like the average supporter would.

“So when I sign your match programme before slinking apologetically back to the dressing room, it’s not quite the same as when Falcao joins Man Utd or even as when Fellaini joins Man Utd.

“Now stop trying to sign for Man Utd, the lot of you.”