FA Cup upsets shock everyone even more than Hazard ball boy shocker

More shocking than seeing her appear behind you in your mirror to a clap of thunder (Img: ¥§•ªˆ¨ˇ© LOVE © ˇ¨ˆª•§¥)

Everyone is totally shocked by the weekend’s shock FA Cup upsets, even more shocked than when Chelsea’s Eden Hazard shocked a ball boy the other day, it has been startled.

The shocks, surprising, were administered by Oldham Athletic, Luton Town, MK Dons and Leeds United over Liverpool, Norwich City, Queens Park Rangers and Tottenham Hotspur respectively, and my goodness didn’t Brentford run Chelsea close?

Hazard’s ball boy fiasco was arguably super-eclipsed by the brain-frazzling achievement of League Two side Bradford City in reaching the League Cup final, so these further applications of shock and upset have left everyone spluttering dimly about bloodyhelldidyouseethat.

Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, Liverpool manager Brendan Rodgers admitted he was so shocked by his side’s 3-2 defeat at Boundary Park that he is still blaming people for it in the media and intends to continue well into next season.

He said: “We’d have got away with it if it wasn’t for those meddling kids, who I picked.

“They made Matt Smith look like Drogba out there. It was like men against boys. Look at Benteke – just look at him!

“Okay, at least close your eyes and picture him. Now, what’s he done since tearing the jacksie out of us at Anfield a few weeks ago? Eh?

“I’ll tell you what Benteke has done since tearing the jacksie out of…what were we talking about again?”

He continued: “Oh yes, so as I was saying, the transfer window gives you a parameter to work in.

“That’s right, bitches – a parameter.”