Michael Dawson and Phil Jagielka were confirmed as definitely being two different people after they were spotted playing against each other in Hull last night.
The pair had long been assumed to be one and the same – that is until they were shown live on Sky greeting each other in the tunnel before Hull City’s 2-2 draw with Everton.
To distinguish each other further, Dawson scored the opening goal of the night as a despairing Jagielka looked on.
Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, Dawson and Jagielka linked arms in solidarity as they expressed their relief.
They chorused: “Yeah, it’s been great to find out we’re actually two different people, to be fair.
“There’s always been that element of doubt – you know, who’s that fella playing for that team who looks and plays exactly like me?
“I’d just figured there was a glitch in the matrix and got on with things, really, but now we know the truth it definitely feels like a weight off.”
They added, pointing at one another: “He’s a good-looking fella, innee?”