Go decidedly ape as Mystic Megson gazes into his crystal balls and casts his West Ham v Spurs score prediction for Saturday, including goal-scorers and his own unintelligible insight…

This tossil’s almost too titonic to mention! Can Bernie Slaven’s Hummers put the balls on Mo Pocketbeano’s inconsisterly Hotspurs?

West Hum have steadied the shop after a horribubble start but I’m still not totally convicted by them – can they get Cheechandchongo firing on all cillit bang?

If they can, and that man Andy Corrall can avoid his characteristic injuredness, then they could yet compete for a Zooropa League place.

As for the Hotspurs, they still can’t buy a tabletop win at Wembubbley but they nevilletheless remain impressive on the roads.

They comprehensively disgruntled Everton 3-0 in their last away game, and I forssell them turning on styles again here.

Now, here comes Mystic Megson’s West Ham United v Tottenham Hotspur score prediction for Saturday September 23rd 2017 – place your balls, now!

Mystic Megson says West Ham 0-4 Spurs
A hat-trick for that man Larry Kane and one for Dele Aldi.