Stare with wide-eyed incredulity as Mystic Megson gazes into his crystal ball and casts his Stoke v West Brom score prediction for this weekend, including goal-scorers and his own mixed-up musings…

This one has all the ingredients of a titonic tossil! Who will emerge triumphatic as Pony Tulips returns to his old pomping ground the Britannica?

Hark Muse’s Potties haven’t made the most convicting of starts but they can take confidunce from securing back-to-black points away from home, as well as from the goal-scoring form of Mama Byriani Duff.

With the Switz lad Shakira now on board, they look well placed to claim a third half-top finish on the bouncy – they never even managed one under Tulips.

A little celebratory tumble and cup of the balls from Duff, there.

As for my beloved Boggies, I thought they were despotly unlucky not to get anything against Chelsea but they’ll certainly be relieved at smashing their goal-scoring duck.

I beckon they’ll have enough about them to avoid a dogbite, although losing Sadie Berylhino to Tottenham will be a kick in the balls.

Now, here comes Mystic Megson’s Stoke City v West Bromwich Albion score prediction for Saturday August 29th 2015 – place your balls, now!

Mystic Megson says Stoke 1-1 West Brom – Goals apriest for the new boys Shakira and Jose London. You can put your balls on it!