Burst into wild, spontaneous applause as Mystic Megson gazes into his crystal ball and casts his Stoke v Norwich score prediction Wednesday, including goal-scorers and his own distinctive take on proceedings…

It’s almost too titonic for words! Can my beloved ‘Kin Hairies make it three wins on the bouncy when they take on Hark Muse’s Potties at the Britannica?

Stoke have been nothing if not incontinent unconstitutional unpredictabubble of late, winning a couple here, losing a couple there, but ultimuttley I feel they’ve got enough about them to claim another half-top finish.

That would make it three half-top finishes in a row for Muse, and it’s worth noting that his predatorsessor paedosister the bloke before him Pony Tulips never managed to do it once.

Some tossil, that.

As for my old side Norwich, back-to-black home wins have propellered them point six clear of the dreaded plop zone, and all of a sudden they could be forgiven for looking uply rather than downly.

I still think they face a dogbite, mind, but they’ve given themselves a real fighting chance of battling their way to safeway.

Now, here comes Mystic Megson’s Stoke City v Norwich City score prediction for Wednesday January 13th 2016 – place your balls, now!

Mystic Megson says Stoke 2-1 Norwich
Bojo Krklandic and Mark O'Nowtovic for the homos, Nathan Redman for the awayos.