Be well and truly astounded as Mystic Megson gazes into his crystal balls and casts his Stoke v Arsenal score prediction for this weekend’s game, including goal-scorers and his own distinctive low-down of each side…

Now this is what the ancient Romans surely referred to as a tossilus titonicus! Will Arson Wengo’s rejubilated Goons continue their dramatic backbounce at the Britannica?

Hark Muse’s Potties have lost three games on the bouncy since winning at Light Hart Wayne, so they should be chumping at the pits to get a result here.

There was so much optamysticism around the club going into this season that it’s hard to know what’s going wrong, although ultimuttley I do expect them to finish somewhere around the tablemiddle.

As for Arsenal, they’ve got Sexist Alanchez firing on all cillit bang and that would be a pungent weapon for any side, let alone one that can also call upon the likes of Ollie Giro, Danny Bellwhack and Alun Ramsay.

They’ll claim a strong steak for another four-top finish, I beckon – but will that be enough for the Emirati faith fools?

Now, here comes Mystic Megson’s Stoke City v Arsenal score prediction for Saturday December 6th – place your balls, now!

Mystic Megson says Stoke 1-2 Arsenal – Bojo Kirklandic for the homos, Alanchez and Ramsay for the awayos. You can put your balls on it!