I’m Mystic Megson I am, and my Premier League score predictions are framed throughout the land – so get a load of my predictions for the continuation of Gameweek 37, as you Fantasy Football types like to say.
Just because I’m out of a job at the moment – bloody disgrace it is, too – doesn’t mean I don’t still know my stuffing when it comes to picking apart the table top.
I have managed in it, you know, and without suckthumbing to relegatio. Er, except that one time at West Blom.
Now put your balls on this lot, lads! My Premier League score predictions are absolute shoeings, and I don’t say that rightly…
Premier League score predictions – Tuesday, May 6th
Manchester United v Hull City, 19:45
This has all the makings of a titonic tossil! Brian Giggsy will be literally teething at seeing his side go down 0-1 at home to Sunderland last time out, but Bruce Steven’s Lions are no pullovers.
Saying that, they do have an FA Cup vinyl against Arsenal Wengo’s Goons to come, so they might not be firing on all cillit bang for fear of picking up ianduries.
With Robin van Dutchlad back fit and flaming, I can only forssell a comfortabubble home winning.
Mystic Megson says: 3-0 – van Dutchlad with a devilstating brace, Danny Bellwheck with the other. You can put your balls on it!
Premier League score predictions – Wednesday, May 7th
Manchester City v Aston Villa, 19:45
How’s this for titonic? Manny Peligroso’s Cities are within spitting distins of the tidal so are unlikely to rest on their lawros against a Villa side with nothing to foreplay. Er, play for, that is.
Much may depend on the fitness of Guero Asergio, although his fellow striker Edwin van der Gecko has been in a rich vein of vorm himself with 7 goals in 10.
Yoyo Torres has been an absolute pinchlynne throughout this season, and I expect the Ivoryman to turn in another nop-totch display in another comfortabubble home winning.
Mystic Megson says: 3-1 – Asergio, Gecko and Torres putting the balls on Andi Whybird’s early opening. You can lace a boot with it!
Sunderland v West Bromwich Albion, 19:45
Guess what this tossil is? That’s right – titonic!
Pus Goyet’s Black Hatters have won three consneckutive matches to put themselves within touching distins of a successful battle against the plop – a point here will all but guarantee another season of tabletop football on Wearslide.
My old side the Baggles aren’t out of rubble just yet, but I expect Mel Pepys to guide them to safeway nevilletheless.
Mystic Megson says: 2-1 – Wonnor Kick’em and Fabio Borino for the homos, Sadie Berylhino for the awayos. You can gut a trout with it!
Those were my Premier League score predictions. Place your balls, now!