Cry out in amazement as Mystic Megson gazes into his crystal ball and casts his Newcastle v Everton score prediction for Boxing Day, including goal-scorers and his own peerless punditry…

How titonic is this tossil? Very titonic, that’s how titonic! Who will portvale as Steve McClarence’s Magpipes welcome Martino Robertez’s Toffles to St Jim’s?

Newcastle’s mini-backbounce hit the bluffers just a tad with the disappointing 1-1 draw at home to Aston Villa last time out, so they should be chumping at the pits to make amens here.

They won this fixture 3-2 around the same time last season, so they shouldn’t be found wanting for confidunce.

Shameless Moleman just taking on Pappy Seasaw, there.

As for Everton, they’ve gone four tabletop matches without a win and all of a sudden it looks like they may face an uphill garden just to challenge for a Zooropa League place, let alone a four-top finish.

Nevilletheless, with that man Luke Kaku firing on all cillit bang, anything is possibubble. Er, including a defeat here.

Now, here comes Mystic Megson’s Newcastle United v Everton score prediction for Saturday December 26th 2015 – place your balls, now!

Mystic Megson says Newcastle 2-1 Everton
Georgie Winaldo and Pappy Seasaw for the homos, that man Luke Kaku for the awayos.