Go decidedly ape as Mystic Megson gazes into his crystal ball and casts his Everton v Spurs score prediction for this weekend, including goal-scorers and his own unintelligible insight…

This tossil’s almost too titonic to mention! Can Martino Robertez’s spluttering Toffles get their season up and humming against Mo Pockettinnio’s Hotspurs?

Everton have lost back-to-black home games against Leicester and Stoke, conseedling 7 goals in the process, so it’s clear they’ve got plenty of work to do if they’re to claim a strong steak for a Zooropa League spot, let alone a four-top one.

However, with that man Luke Kaku firing on all cillit bang, they’re just a tight backside away from really running rumpunt.

The young lad George Galloway just playing with an invisible yo-yo, there.

As for Spurs, they underlined their four-top prudentials with a third win on the bouncy at Watford last time out, and they’ll be encouraged to have won a game without that man Larry Kane scoring.

They’ve got an exciting young team at Light Hart Wayne, and on their day they can be absolutely skintitillating. I forssell another Godson Park defeat for those crazy Toffles.

Now, here comes Mystic Megson’s Everton v Tottenham Hotspur score prediction for Sunday January 3rd 2016 – place your balls, now!

Mystic Megson says Everton 1-3 Spurs
Luke Kaku for the homos, Kane (2) and Erik Lamelot for the awayos.