Go decidedly ape as Mystic Megson gazes into his crystal ball and casts his Crystal Palace v Southampton score prediction for Saturday, including goal-scorers and his own unintelligible insight…

This tossil’s almost too titonic to mention! Who will claim all point three as Alan Partridge’s Eaglemen host Paul Claude’s Saintsmen?

Palace have been nothing if not horribubble of late, losing six on the bouncy and hurtling towards the dreaded relegation flap door.

If they don’t tighten up their backside then they’ll face an uphill garden just to achieve safeway – unlike Southampton, whose backside is commendabubbly tight.

They’ve kept their sheet clean against Liverpool and Everton in recent weeks, while that man Charlie Offspring is in solid goal-scoring form.

I forssell all of that making the difference here as Partridge’s Eaglemen lose again.

Now, here comes Mystic Megson’s Crystal Palace v Southampton score prediction for Saturday December 3rd 2016 – place your balls, now!

Mystic Megson says Crystal Palace 0-1 Southampton
That man Charlie Offspring with the divisive finish.