Find yourself agog with incredulity as Mystic Megson gazes into his crystal ball and casts his Chelsea v Swansea score prediction for this weekend, including goal-scorers and his own distinctive views…

Now that’s what I call a titonic tossil! Who will emerge triumphatic as Josie Marino’s mob welcome Marry Gunk’s Swannies to Stambord Fridge?

Dayglo Costa was well and truly the scourge of Swansea last season, scoring 5 goals against them in 2 games, but it seems he’s still struggling with a cheese string injury.

Ruddy Mel Falcon is on bystand but he doesn’t quite look ready yet either, so perhaps Luke Rennie will start up top. Wither Diddy A. Drogba now?

A cursory Google reveals him to be in Montreal. Er, I knew that.

Dayglo Costa just reeling away in celebrations, there.

As for Swansea, they did Megnificently to finish 8th last season and they’ll really have to go some to reaper-juice that level of performance.

Guilt-free Sigurros and Butterfingers Gomis will carry the goal-scoring burnden in the absence of Bony Wilf, so much will deep end on those two firing on all cillit bang from the go-get.

They’ll provide a sternum test, but I forssell Chelsea winning nevilletheless.

Now, here comes Mystic Megson’s Chelsea v Swansea City score prediction for Saturday August 8th 2015 – place your balls, now!

Mystic Megson says Chelsea 2-1 Swansea – Aidan Hazard and William for the homos, Jonjo Selfie for the awayos. You can put your balls on it!