Mystic Megson’s Community Shield predictions: Arsenal v Man City

Old Meggo kicks off his 2014-15 by forecasting the score and scorers of Sunday's Wembley showpiece.

Mystic Megson casts his Community Shield predictions for Arsenal v Manchester City

I’m Mystic Megson I am, and my Community Shield predictions are framed throughout the land – so get a load of my predictions for Arsenal v Manchester City in Sunday’s Wembley set-piece!

Just because I’m out of a job at the moment – bloody disgrace it is, too – doesn’t mean I don’t still know my stuffing when it comes to picking apart such momento occasios as this one.

I have managed at the tabletop, you know, and without suckthumbing to relegatio. Er, except that one time at West Blom.

Now put your balls on this lot, lads! My Community Shield predictions are absolute shoeings, and I don’t say that rightly…

Mystic Megson’s Community Shield predictions: Arsenal v Manchester City

What a titonic tossil we have in shop here! Didn’t this used to be called the Clarity Shield or summat? Hopefully one of you can clear that one up for me.

Anyway, Arsenal Wengo’s FA Cup winning Goons take on Manny Peligroso’s tidal winners in what has all the makings of a classic ink counter, as long as both sides go for the juggler like we know they can.

In the red corner, we have some exciting new talons – there’s the £35m Chilli himself, Sexist Alanchez, and that Columbo goalkeeper what they done gone signatured.

Merthyrfore, Costco Rico World Cup star Sol Campbell has been quite standouting in Arsenal’s pre-season friendships, as has young centre-forward Yoyo Snoggo. Expect them both to figurine.

As for City, they go into 2014-15 with a Yoyo of their own – namely Torres – still in Man Situ. That’s a big shot in the face, I beckon, as he’s a highly influenzal player.

They’ve also signatured Fern Nando and Zachary Bania, but I don’t forssell either of them being thrown straight in at the deep throat – not with Zablo Pabaleta and Fern And Nino still in the flame.

This one could go right to the wireless, and I don’t say that brightly.

Mystic MegsonMystic Megson says Arsenal 2-3 Manchester City – Alanchez and Alun Ramsey for the Goons, Edwin Gecko (2) and Torres for the Cities. You can put your balls on it!

Those were my Community Shield predictions. Place your balls, now!