The best Newcastle takeover jokes as Companies House documents fuel more rumours

Discussions with Saudi Arabian consortium 'nearing completion'.

There were Newcastle takeover jokes after Companies House documents fuelled rumours
(Image: Johnvedwards)

The internet is awash with speculation after another takeover rumour involving Newcastle United emerged.

Social media users are scrutinising flights and documents submitted to Companies House after reports that Amanda Staveley of PCP Capital Partners is attempting to broker a deal to purchase the club from current owner Mike Ashley.


Staveley is said to be leading a group largely financed by the Public Investment Fund of Saudi Arabia, including British billionaire brothers David and Simon Reuben.

These were the best Newcastle takeover jokes as submissions to Companies House ‘prove advanced talks are nearing completion’:

just been sent this, make of it what you will #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/s1wqt3pOXB

— max (@shxIvey_) April 14, 2020

"Have the Saudis passed their Fit-and-Proper Directors test?…They give the test."#NUFC #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/7ZW6RM0zfv

— Orange Deleted The Twins (@SambaCherno) April 14, 2020

Steve Bruce logging onto Zoom this morning #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/Q54OXtUDCs

— NG (@NG1892_) April 14, 2020

Can’t wait for these Sheiks to realise it’s Firetrap I’m trying to sell them.

£150m for that, thank you very much. Daft cunts.#NUFCTakeover

— Mike Ashley (@MoneyMikeAshley) April 14, 2020

Say what you want about Only fans, but Amanda Staveley has just moved into her dream home #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/Ot0ZFqyq3c

— Bradley Carey (@Bradcarey09) April 14, 2020


Lads, I've cracked the code, hidden in plain sight. #CANS #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/UyUJCPeR0C

— Ian Hunter (@BeefDinners) February 5, 2020


House after tonight #NUFCTakeover #cans pic.twitter.com/LQnhpXe3QA

— Lee Walkerr (@LeeWalkerr) April 14, 2020


Your Royal Highness, the end is in sight. #cans #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/DwRBXCQjyN

— Bill (@orrible_git) April 14, 2020

I know I've said I'm not getting carried away with this takeover but here's a picture I made of Saint Maximin riding a camel holding the UCL and PL trophies while Alan Barnes is riding next to him with a recently beheaded Mike Ashley in his hands #NUFCTakeover #NUFC pic.twitter.com/lxsue39uJQ

— 🇸🇦لويس ماكجيفيرن 🇸🇦 (@LM_0200) April 14, 2020

The bairns already celebrating 😂😂 #nufctakeover pic.twitter.com/YOXRg5nQRV

— Ste saint maximin🇸🇦🇸🇦 (@stenicho86) April 14, 2020

Steve Bruce once we get took over 💯 pic.twitter.com/EoySEbohqD

— Kenny Nixon Herron (@KDNH1995) April 14, 2020

HOWS THE TAKEOVER DID YA SAY? #nufc pic.twitter.com/zc3BFJ9me1

— Tyler Hutchinson (@HutchTyler) April 14, 2020

When the Saudi family role into #nufc #NUFCtakeover pic.twitter.com/Iwr24F2FM8

— ⛔ASHLEY OUT⛔ (@SleepingGiantsX) April 14, 2020

Just bumped into Davey bin Salmon and he couldn’t speak much English, he could only say ‘cans’
Ill take that!! #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/fKkbXNvCxp

— Davey Beardsley 🧟‍♂️ (@daveynicnufc) April 10, 2020

Imagine if this Saudi interest is all just bullshit…. we’ll be left lumbered with Ashley but we’ll know every single Saudi investment, aircraft journey and tail plate going. They’ll probably put restraining orders on us all. #nufc #NUFCTakeover

— Paul Watson (@Paul_Watson__) April 13, 2020

#NUFCTakeover – My understanding is that I haven’t got a clue. But something may or may not be communicated about the future of #NUFC at a point in the future, or not.

— The__Farmster (@The__Farmster) April 13, 2020

Mike Ashley is probably sitting in his Miami mansion on his throne made from sports direct catalogues sipping brown ale out of his sports direct mega mug laughing at all these takeover rumours #nufc #nufctakeover

— lewis cant (@cant_lewis) April 13, 2020

Who’s getting this tattoo? #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/Jm6MG7bbx5

— Ska’d 4 life (@cyptoon) April 13, 2020

I’m not one to put two and two together but I’m about to order Messi 10 on a home shirt on the club shop website. #nufctakeover pic.twitter.com/dm8LFQDlFO

— Lee Robson (@leerobson23) April 13, 2020

Shirt ready #NUFCTakeover #NUFC pic.twitter.com/7WGZOG93Nx

— James Rae ⚫⚪⚫⚪⚫ (@jrae1990) April 14, 2020

Wor Amanda could be my new Nigella if she pulls this off like #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/AQyL6V3WOD

— Granty (@GrantyNUFC2020) April 14, 2020

How I’ll be if this happens 😂 #NUFCTakeover #nufc pic.twitter.com/uXH6hg2SwB

— Mark Nicholson (@marknicholson26) April 14, 2020


Right now I'd take being taken over by Charlie Methven and us running out to N trance set you free over Mike Ashley #NUFCTakeover

— Mark Scott (@Throptoon) April 14, 2020

The worst thing about these #NUFCTakeover sagas are the uncertainty they cause Apple, Google, Facebook and Microsoft. Who I’m sure are all waiting to pounce and hire Lee fucking Charnley once he becomes available. #nufc

— Ian McCormick (@Ian_Mac3) April 14, 2020

Companies House information looks legit. Just in case…….. #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/PR0ROGq23l

— Brian Nicholson (@Brian_NUFC) April 14, 2020

Lockdown restrictions extended to September after #nufc fans ignore govenrment guidelines on social distancing to attend #Messi' unveiling at St James' Park #NUFCTakeover pic.twitter.com/P6isxAuwQ9

— Jack. (@jackc1) April 14, 2020




I swear if someone is hoaxing this takeover news, they deserve to go and live with Carole fucking Baskin #NUFCTakeover

— Dan Johnstone (@dan2jo) April 14, 2020

I’m still waiting for lee Ryder to say no proof of funds 😂 #nufc #NUFCTakeover

— Jordan Morris (@mozzaNUFC95) April 14, 2020


First official photo of the new @NUFC owner. #nufcfakeover #NUFCTakeover #ashleyout pic.twitter.com/Wh1FH7SOwH

— Sky Sports News (@WorPhill) April 14, 2020