The best FIFA jokes after US-backed arrests in Zurich

All the best jokes from the dramatic day as seven are held by police.

Just maybe, Sepp Blatter can't afford to laugh at the FIFA jokes following the dramatic arrests in Zurich and the US prosecution case
IN TROUBLE: FIFA (Image: Marcello Casal JR/ABr)

As the investigation and arrests continue, do not miss this collection of the best FIFA jokes following the dramatic events on Wednesday that saw seven people held by police in Zurich.


We were tirelessly trawling through Twitter as the United States accused the world football organisation of accepting bribes and kickbacks estimated at more than $150m over a 24-year period.

US Attorney General Loretta Lynch said:

Two generations of soccer officials used their positions to solicit bribes. They did this over and over, year after year, tournament after tournament.

They corrupted the business of worldwide soccer to serve their interests and to enrich themselves.

But that’s not very funny, so let’s move on to the FIFA jokes we found as the police investigation unfolded and arrests were made in Switzerland:

EXCLUSIVE: One of the FIFA officials getting arrested in Switzerland… pic.twitter.com/p0oVqphIx2

— Brooks Peck (@BrooksDT) May 27, 2015

I bet they find the blueprint for a new Death Star. #FIFA

— Matthew Doyle (@MLSAnalyst) May 27, 2015

Over at #FIFA this morning. pic.twitter.com/Jv6gSOL0Ee

— Sophia Cannon (@UndercoverMutha) May 27, 2015

Finally, an American invasion we can all get behind. #FIFA

— Ian Moore (@ianmodmoore) May 27, 2015

"did they leave yet? Text me when they leave" #FIFA pic.twitter.com/8soGxk2ZHm

— Trevor Hayward (@HeyHayward) May 27, 2015

Hope these corrupt FIFA officials get booted out and given very large penalties. If you sighed at these puns I'd like to see you do Blatter.

— Greg James (@gregjames) May 27, 2015

The beautiful irony is that #FIFA has been trying for decades to get the Yanks interested in "soccer". They got the FBI interested at least.

— Anshel Pfeffer (@AnshelPfeffer) May 27, 2015

Today, my thoughts are with this young lady. #Fifa pic.twitter.com/J8XFCelJpz

— Fat Brestovca (@FatPresenter) May 27, 2015

David Beckham to lead the Old Bailey's bid to host the FIFA trials.

— Danny Kelly (@dannykellywords) May 27, 2015

"This probe is good for #FIFA," says their communications boss. as the first picture emerges of clean-up operation. pic.twitter.com/9pqHX9oP1z

— Des Kelly (@DesKellyBTS) May 27, 2015

Pictures just in from Zurich of Sepp's emergency meeting with the FIFA Executive Committee… pic.twitter.com/zxefsem4Fc

— Paul Hawksbee (@PaulHawksbee) May 27, 2015

FIFA's crack team of anti corruption officials roll into action pic.twitter.com/xiawwPdtAb

— Ern Malley (@loveandgarbage) May 27, 2015

FIFA spokesperson says Sepp Blatter is currently 'quite relaxed' about the whole situation… pic.twitter.com/z48jIBYh8m

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) May 27, 2015

When there's six people arrested at #FIFA, and one of them is not you…https://t.co/JycnwYWuvw

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) May 27, 2015

Investigating #FIFA for corruption must be like searching Dunkin' Donuts for donuts.

— Nick (@angry_eyebrowz) May 27, 2015

BREAKING: Swiss Police confirm that, when arrested, all seven FIFA officials threw themselves on the ground and pretended to be injured.

— Scott Snowden (@LorumIpsum) May 27, 2015

Bond villain's subterranean volcano lair, or #FIFA HQ? The answer may surprise you pic.twitter.com/CZIE5athIs

— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) May 27, 2015

All disks of FIFA 2016 will be scratched heavily so you get to experience as much corruption as the real FIFA

— Xbone (@TheXbone) May 27, 2015

Police release picture's of FIFA's headquarters #FIFAarrests pic.twitter.com/yJcU4uLKV9

— Dapper (@dapperlaughs) May 27, 2015

FIFA 16 cover athlete unveiled. pic.twitter.com/baKZnO3TA5

— Steve McPherson (@steventurous) May 27, 2015

#FIFA, be warned. pic.twitter.com/eB27zHZj11

— Bleacher Report UK (@br_uk) May 27, 2015

I guess the FIFA officials thought it was ok to accept kickbacks as long as they didn't use their hands.

— (maura) (@behindyourback) May 27, 2015

#Fifa 16 FBI edition pic.twitter.com/VIP5fAvLgn

— ChileComparte (@chilecomparte) May 27, 2015

This FIFA play-by-play is getting too much. Call us when they haul the giant golden statue of Sepp in Zurich town square down by its neck.

— Who Ate All The Pies (@waatpies) May 27, 2015

Love that one of the arrested FIFA execs is head of football in the Cayman Islands. Which are of course famous for…sports, I think?

— Ken Tremendous (@KenTremendous) May 27, 2015

Meanwhile at #FIFA…. pic.twitter.com/nDI7uETpDh

— BenchWarmers (@BeWarmers) May 27, 2015

Qatari World Cup team make impassioned plea after FIFA scandal throws event into doubt. “Will all those workers’ deaths be in vain?”

— HaveIGotNewsForYou (@haveigotnews) May 27, 2015

All new game features for FIFA 16: - Brown envelopes - Prison mode - Tournaments in unplayable conditions pic.twitter.com/Id7oTUsm6m

— Sunday League FC (@SundayLeagueFC) May 27, 2015

#FIFA Press officer insists everything is fine, there are no tanks in Baghdad, plans for Antarctica 2026 still on ?? pic.twitter.com/jiSfcQmk8z

— Bookie Bashers (@BookieBashers_) May 27, 2015

For people who don’t follow soccer, this is like Cersei Lannister, Ramsay Bolton and Littlefinger all got arrested at once. #FIFA

— Gary Whitta (@garywhitta) May 27, 2015

2021: Nuclear war. Entire planet atomised. Every human killed. Taped message from FIFA: "2022 World Cup in Qatar will go ahead as planned."

— Danny Kelly (@dannykellywords) May 27, 2015

The real reason why FIFA officials were arrested. #NoEraPenal pic.twitter.com/6TCghnpQrA

— She Wants Da Chorizo (@ShiWantsTheC) May 27, 2015

Oh man. Not FIFA. Always who you least expect, isn't it?

— Richard (@_L_M_C_) May 27, 2015

I know nothing about #FIFA except that they're tangentially responsible for the vuvuzela so flog them all publicly in the town square.

— nascarcasm (@nascarcasm) May 27, 2015