The best England jokes after 5-0 ‘triumph’ against San Marino

More England jokes despite a 5-0 scoreline and continued progress towards Euro 2016 qualification.

Fans, obviously impressed with the England jokes from the 5-0 win against San Marino
UNIMPRESSED: England fans (Image: Zulfinho)

Enjoy more England jokes even as Roy Hodgson’s side continue their progress towards Euro 2016 qualification with a 5-0 Group E home win over San Marino.


The convincing scoreline did not reflect the views of the fans however, as support and belief in the national team remains at an all-time low.

Thankfully, no international match at Wembley would be complete without millions of England jokes to accompany the action.

Check out our favourite England jokes from their triumphant 5-0 victory against San Marino at Wembley:

Got to admire the 40,000 fans paying to watch one of the worst international teams around,as they look to beat San Marino at Wembley tonight

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) October 9, 2014

At Wembley, to see a bunch of plucky no-hopers seemingly doomed to perennial disappointment take on San Marino etc. etc. etc.

— Tom Williams (@tomwfootball) October 9, 2014

Plucky England avoid conceding in 1st minute against San Marino

— Rob Harris (@RobHarris) October 9, 2014

Watching England like.. pic.twitter.com/EM121i9c0v

— Sunday League Footy (@SundayChants) October 9, 2014

The whole population of San Marino could easily fit into Wembley, they just don’t want to, because watching England is tedious. #EngvSM

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) October 9, 2014

If England Soccer Club keep on, maybe they can go as far as the USMNT in the World Cup next year. #threelines #JackieAnelka

— Soccer Guy (@usasoccerguy) October 9, 2014

Roy Hodgson said What an exciting half that was. I said Should we sit back & try to consolidate our 2-0 lead? He said Yes. Great idea, James

— Boring James Milner (@BoringMilner) October 9, 2014

People will say that England were uninspiring, but they inspired me to take the dog out.

— Harry Pearson (@camsell59) October 9, 2014

If you were playing FIFA 2014 against your mate and you were England and he was San Marino and it was just 2-0 at half time you'd be gutted.

— Danny Baker (@prodnose) October 9, 2014

I just hope that England can hold on for the win.

— Paul Tomkins (@paul_tomkins) October 9, 2014

England are gunna win the World Cup!

— Aden Flint (@AFlint4) October 9, 2014

Roy Hodgson is like your weird uncle who you only see once every 3 months and he always gives you a dead pigeon for your birthday

— Ca'rlton (@_CarltonCole9) October 9, 2014

"How to Win 5-0 Ugly"… A Tactical Masterclass by Roy Hodgson. #England

— The Redmen TV (@TheRedmenTV) October 9, 2014