The best David Moyes jokes as Manchester United set to sack manager

The best David Moyes jokes from Twitter after widespread media reports that Manchester United were about to sack their manager.

More David Moyes jokes appeared on Twitter after Manchester United are forced to deny they have sacked their manager
Moyes… Might be sacked (Based on image by Jon Candy)

Many, many more David Moyes jokes after strong rumours and widespread media reports that Manchester United were about to sack their manager emerged yesterday.

UPDATE! The best David Moyes sacked jokes as United do the unthinkable


In a most underwhelming vote of confidence, the illustrious club have apparently offered “no comment” on the current situation.

Will this be the final wave of David Moyes jokes? Has the hilarious (mis)adventure finally come to an end?

As of now, we’re still not sure.

Not that it matters, let’s just enjoy this latest batch of David Moyes jokes while we can.

Newspaper reports claiming Man Utd are to sack David Moyes… pic.twitter.com/S00D6EP8Op

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) April 21, 2014

David Moyes is to be sacked by Manchester United. Here's all the records he broke whilst manager at Old Trafford pic.twitter.com/8SGYZpOgF2

— Football Funnys (@FootballFunnys) April 21, 2014

So Moyes gets to pick his successor? That's how it works, right?

— Jonathan Liew (@jonathanliew) April 21, 2014

BREAKING NEWS: David Moyes to be fired for losing dressing room he never found.

— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) April 21, 2014

David Moyes was sacked by Yaya Toure. #ToureFacts

— Yaya Toure Facts (@ToureFacts) April 21, 2014

Moyes sacking is like Scottish independence. They can't be trusted with millions of pounds – they'll blow it on Super Tennants & smack…

— Brick Top (@TheRealBrickTop) April 21, 2014

Sky Sports News have just checked Twitter and are now reporting that Moyes could be sacked…

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) April 21, 2014

Moyes should be allowed address Man Utd fans before he goes: "Your job now is to stand by our new manager. That is important."

— Conor McNamara (@ConorMcNamaraIE) April 21, 2014

So David Moyes is going. It's the end of an error.

— David Anderson (@MirrorAnderson) April 21, 2014

Generic David Moyes tweet

— Barney Ronay (@barneyronay) April 21, 2014

Since WORLD WAR 2 No other event has freed so many people of tyranny & injustice until this day when Moyes is sacked. MoyesOut

— David Moyes Out (@MoyesOutASAP) April 21, 2014


— (via @JonnyGabriel) (@JonnyGabriel) April 21, 2014

Whoever they bring in to replace Moyes, I hope they get the best out of Anderson.

— Tom Coast (@sardinetrawler) April 21, 2014

Moyes facing the sack pic.twitter.com/pVmCj0RSVE

— DW (@Davidrwickenden) April 21, 2014

Surely only one man can replace David Moyes at Old Trafford.. pic.twitter.com/IYRVLut14E

— Football Funnys (@FootballFunnys) April 21, 2014

How do you think Moyes firing went down? I imagine him slicing into a pigeon pie with his Valyrian sword, then swigging wine from a chalice

— roger bennett (@rogbennett) April 21, 2014

If David Moyes does get sacked by Man United, then he should become the new manager of UKIP… They have no interest in Europe either.

— Tez (@tezilyas) April 21, 2014

TRULLY SHOCKING . @manutd deleted tweet just after they confirm moyes is sacked. trully grate banter. pic.twitter.com/uo4MwmiBpm

— ITK Agent Didìer (@ITKDidier) April 21, 2014

Don't worry about Moyes. He has a lucrative dismissal clause in the 6-year contract he signed with Chelsea, Man City, Liverpool and Arsenal.

— David Schneider (@davidschneider) April 21, 2014

If Moyes is sacked today I will run naked around Piccadilly Gardens, with Steve Round on my back while he spanks me with his set play manual

— Rob B. (@_Rob_B) April 21, 2014


— Beijing Red 4 Lyf (@Moyes_Must_Go) April 21, 2014

That grim reaper behind Moyes at Everton was right. If anyone sees him, get next week's lottery numbers from him.

— Paul Hayward (@_PaulHayward) April 21, 2014

Moyes gets £7m performances out of £3m players, and £7m performances out of £30m players. Alas, it was never going to last.

— Paul Tomkins (@paul_tomkins) April 21, 2014

Easiest job in world football management – following Moyes at United.

— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) April 21, 2014

Reports suggest Moyes is to be sacked… pic.twitter.com/j4oib6sA7X

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) April 21, 2014

"No. That's fair enough, I'll collect my things. Can I keep the tow… dry-cleaned and returned. Sure. No problem." pic.twitter.com/e8OZZUPFL8

— Daniel Sandison (@DanielSandison) March 16, 2014

Coming to a Jobcentre near you……..#moyesout pic.twitter.com/6owdP8RlZT

— Ladbrokes (@Ladbrokes) April 21, 2014

Moyes currently in a strange sacked/nonsacked quantum state, a sort of Schrodinger’s Moyes. Only when he’s let out of his box will we know.

— Mr Eugenides (@Mr_Eugenides) April 21, 2014

ALL NETWORKS: Man United refusing to confirm denial on speculation that Moyes disclaimer corroborates earlier veto.

— Danny Baker (@prodnose) April 21, 2014

Moyes, I've been sacked few times. Biggest blow; now have to buy yr own stationery. Tip: take some staples & couple of highlighters with you

— martin kelner (@martinkelner) April 21, 2014

Moyes was always going to die for Fergie's sins…crucifying him at Easter purely poetic. #mufc

— James Masters (@Masters_JamesD) April 21, 2014

Man Utd says 'no comment' about the current David Moyes' situation pic.twitter.com/lAn8ddTql0

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) April 21, 2014

Wilfried Zaha reacts to news that David Moyes could be sacked. #mufc pic.twitter.com/SQLyL3t26c

— United News (@Mufc_Info) April 21, 2014

Moyes gone? to be honest it had to happen. You can't have Argos regional manager looking after worldwide House Of Fraser.

— Austin (@AustinDaboh) April 21, 2014

After losing so many games is the sacking of David Moyes inevitable? Jedward have had better records.

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) April 21, 2014

Oh well, it was funny while it lasted… #Moyes

— Tom (@FourFourTom) April 21, 2014

"I'm still the right man for the job" insists David Moyes as he arrives at Starbucks for a second interview.

— Oldfirmfacts (@Oldfirmfacts1) April 21, 2014

Twitter seems to have sacked David Moyes. Not Manchester United…

— GetYourTipsOut (@GetYourTipsOut) April 21, 2014

For those asking: I've only heard rumours that Moyes is going 2night. Nothing concrete but I have Cool & The Gang's "Celebration" on standby

— Andy Goldstein MBE (@andygoldstein05) April 21, 2014

Legoland mock up "Taxi For Moyes" of Lego United manager outside Old Trafford http://t.co/D3ubOWhcp6 pic.twitter.com/BDJY4anibm

— ITV Granada Reports (@GranadaReports) April 21, 2014

10% of Manchester United fans want Tony Pulis to be their next manager. THIS IS WHAT YOU'VE DONE, DAVID MOYES. pic.twitter.com/9u8oHi8ucT

— SB Nation Soccer (@SBNationSoccer) April 21, 2014

Moyes out….me and Ted in! pic.twitter.com/b0GuT2309H

— Fr Dougal McGuire (@DougalMacGuire) April 21, 2014

Rumours that Moyes was getting the sack have been met by angry protests outside OT Utd had to call the police to have angry LFC fans removed

— Paul LFC Foreman (@redsmicer) April 21, 2014

David Moyes would be the first manager that Manchester United have sacked since 1986. One final record. #MUFC

— Football__Tweet (@Football__Tweet) April 21, 2014

Moyes' sacking playing out like his tenure as manager. Drawn out, embarrassing and full of false dawns followed by crushing disappointment.

— pauliegunn (@PaulGunning1) April 21, 2014

Delay to Moyes announcement due to a hitch in contract negotiations with the new official MUFC sacking partner

— Duncan Drasdo (@Drasdo) April 21, 2014

We've just ordered David Moyes's leaving card off Funky Pigeon… pic.twitter.com/drqS1KQkrq

— Adnan Januzaj Lad (@cheapjanuzaj) April 21, 2014

Chelsea in talks to buy Moyes and send him out on loan to Liverpool next season..

— Chris Cohen (@Chris_Cohen) April 21, 2014

United decide it time to sack when becoming mathematically impossible for mind of Moyes to no be retarded.

— Evil Kagawa (@evilkagawa) April 21, 2014

Spurs-supporting Coldstream Guard gets news that Tottenham might go for soon-to-be-sacked David Moyes… pic.twitter.com/twuSWzZ4Mf

— Danny Kelly (@dannykellywords) April 21, 2014


PLUS! UPDATE: The best David Moyes sacked jokes as United do the unthinkable