This weekend’s most exquisite tweets include a consummate murder from Everton’s Apostolos ‘Norman Bates’ Vellios, a nasty skipping rope accident involving the captain of Leyton Orient, and a cunning plan for Tottenham Hotspur that may one day result in a film titled The Great Bale McEvoy Swindle…
Hornets Nest Poking of the Weekend
George Lineker, son of Gary
Cleared it up very well, cheers mate. @Joey7Barton pic.twitter.com/drvUxGMXmZ
— George Lineker (@GeorgeLineker) August 3, 2013
Cunning Plan of the Weekend
Spurs sending their young winger Kenneth McEvoy to Real Madrid instead of Gareth Bale
I know my boy @kennethMcevoy is getting loads of attention from all the "send him instead of Bale" shouts, even Balotelli said it
— BradleyGarmston#3 (@BradleyGarmston) August 3, 2013
@BradleyGarmston haha never escaping it
— kenneth Mcevoy Jnr (@kennethMcevoy) August 3, 2013
Let’s get a look at the two side by side…
The old Bale McEvoy switcheroo? Might just work, y’know.
Acknowledgement of the Weekend
Jack Wilshere with Arsenal’s ‘Running Man’
Good to be back at home today in the Emirates Cup! Good to see all the Gooners! And of course 'The Running Man!' pic.twitter.com/EpLDYqiWAC
— Jack Wilshere (@JackWilshere) August 3, 2013
Read more about Arsenal’s Running Man
Unfavourable Playing Conditions of the Weekend
Wherever this is
@VincentKompany pic.twitter.com/Gptc6vurIj
— FootyGraphs (@FootyGraphs) August 3, 2013
Gossip of the Weekend
Joe Ledley, Celtic
@HOOP588 @grsportsmassage snoopy is gay.
— Joe ledley (@joe16led) August 3, 2013
Nostalgia of the Weekend
Jody Morris, ex-Chelsea and Leeds United
what about how good I thought my suit looked???..back then Gucci Loafers made up for any baggy whistle haha pic.twitter.com/eS3sHra5df
— jody morris (@morriskid) August 3, 2013
Amusing Timeline Juxtaposition of the Weekend
Corner to Exeter – 58 mins
— Bristol Rovers (@Official_BRFC) August 3, 2013
Southend corner #pafc
— Plymouth Argyle FC (@Only1Argyle) August 3, 2013
Welcome back, football!
Enthusiasm of the Weekend
Bristol Rovers
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLL
— Bristol Rovers (@Official_BRFC) August 3, 2013
Dutifulness of the Weekend
Barnsley
FT: Barnsley 0 Wigan 4
— Barnsley FC (@bfc_official) August 3, 2013
Flapjack Hype of the Weekend
Ikechi Anya, Watford
Thanks for the messages guys great to get off to a winning start !!!! Back on the flapjack hype #ifyouknowyouknow pic.twitter.com/C2ldGpMify
— Ikechi (@IkechiAnya) August 3, 2013
Ikechi also had a music recommendation for us…
Celebrating todays win chillin out relaxing to my bros @ChimaAnya new dope single https://t.co/ZGHKKBV6OW FAKE IT TILL U MAKE IT
— Ikechi (@IkechiAnya) August 3, 2013
“Please Excuse” Note of the Weekend
Yannick Bolasie, Crystal Palace
Falcao is sick
— Yannick Yala (@YannickBolasie) August 3, 2013
Funny, he looked fine during double maths yesterday.
Illustrative Photography of the Week
Ian Abrahams, talkSPORT
HT Bournemouth 1-0 Charlton -to me Bournemouth are the championship's equivilent of Swansea in way they play pic.twitter.com/SJPX9T4Qqe
— Ian Abrahams (@BroadcastMoose) August 3, 2013
Entertaining game at Dean Court & a winning start for Bournemouth, who were the better side for long periods pic.twitter.com/qEHW7QrvXK
— Ian Abrahams (@BroadcastMoose) August 3, 2013
Yann Kermorgant with a sensational acrobatic equaliser pic.twitter.com/h71T0TlP5j
— Ian Abrahams (@BroadcastMoose) August 3, 2013
Future The Apprentice Contestant of the Weekend
Reece Wabara, Manchester City
I'm from where your hustle determines your salary
— Reece Wabara (@ReeceWabara) August 3, 2013
Tripped Over a Skipping Rope of the Weekend
Nathan Clarke, Leyton Orient
Just picked up the skipper @nathanclarke6 good to see him back and on his feet
— dean cox (@dean_7cox) August 3, 2013
Seriously, though – get well soon, Nathan!
Successful Bumble-Bee-Oplasty Operation of the Weekend
Luke Ayling, Yeovil Town
What a great result that was! Buzzing so much!!
— Luke Ayling (@lukeayling_8) August 3, 2013
Self-Reinvention of the Weekend
Michael Owen, ex-England
After watching the goalkeepers on display at Anfield earlier today I think I'm ready to make a comeback! http://t.co/Ye4XhWnH7m
— michael owen (@themichaelowen) August 3, 2013
Axe Murderer of the Weekend
Apostolos Vellios, Everton
Goodmorning @gerardeulofeu Hahahha pic.twitter.com/dehga2abHP
— vellios apostolos (@tolisvellios) August 3, 2013
Tune in on Friday for our Football Tweets of the Week!