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Football Tweets of the Week: Harte, Barton, Bendtner, Collymore and several others!

Giovanni Trapattoni
Trapattoni… Or is it Lloyd Bridges? (Img: Майоров Владимир)

Gather round, gather round, and get a face load of Football Burp’s Football Tweets of the Week!

Trapattoni Diss of the Week

Ian Harte and Adam Le Fondre, Reading

@ianharte23 #wand

— Adam Le Fondre (@A1F1E9) February 5, 2013

Waking Up in a Weird Place of the Week

Kevin Kilbane, ex-West Bromwich Albion, Everton and Sunderland

Looks like I’m on the treadmill again this morning!

— Kevin Kilbane (@kdkilbane77) February 5, 2013

Unfortunate Collision of the Week

Marc Albrighton, Aston Villa and Steve Froggatt, ex-Aston Villa, Wolverhampton Wanderers and Coventry City

Just bumped into Marc Albrighton smashing lad local boy out with a broken foot will be out for another few weeks. #avfc

— Steve Froggatt (@SteveFroggy) February 8, 2013

Crossed Paths of the Week

Billy Sharp, Nottingham Forest and Geri Halliwell, Spice Girls

Really really want I really really want a pic a pic a picture with geri halliwell thanks ginger spice @foundationljs twitter.com/billysharp10/s…

— billy sharp (@billysharp10) February 6, 2013

Unusually Excited By a Baseball Team from Houston of the Week

Graham Gartland, Shelbourne

Wow….. Stiff this morning #astros

— Graham Gartland (@Garts6) February 5, 2013

Multiple Affirmations of the Week

Marlon Harewood, Barnsley

Yep a lot

— Marlon Harewood (@Mazer_9) February 5, 2013

Knocking Over a Tree of the Week

Matt Le Tissier, ex-Southampton

I only leant on it for a rest!! Don’t know my own strength! :-)) twitter.com/mattletiss7/st…

— Matt Le Tissier (@mattletiss7) February 5, 2013

Ironed Their Own Shirts of the Week

The Ferdinand brothers

One of our mum and dads proudest moments!!! twitter.com/anton_ferdinan…

— Anton Ferdinand (@anton_ferdinand) February 5, 2013

Question of the Week

Nicklas Bendtner, Arsenal

why are you so crazy about this girl???

— Nicklas Bendtner (@bendtnerb52) February 6, 2013

Admission of the Week

Zak Ansah, Arsenal

Ronaldinho gives me goosebumps

— Zak Ansah (@ZakAnsah) February 6, 2013

Admission of the Week II

Sean Morrison, Reading

I’d teabag ryan gosling … #facts

— sean morrison (@seanmorrison_91) February 7, 2013

Admission of the Week III

Gary Madine, Sheffield Wednesday

Am I a complete weirdo or does evry1 dutch oven there selves in bed???

— Gary Madine (@GaryMadine9) February 6, 2013

Explanation of the Week

Gary Madine, Sheffield Wednesday

Sorry, dutch oven is when u fart under the blanket then put your head under. Burns the nostrils

— Gary Madine (@GaryMadine9) February 7, 2013

Gloat of the Week

Ian Abrahams, talkSPORT

Did hint on Sunday both Nottingham clubs would be searching for a new manager

— Ian Abrahams (@BroadcastMoose) February 5, 2013

Understatement of the Week

Gary Neville, ex-Manchester United

“@skynewsbreak: UPDATE: Food Standards Agency says some Findus beef lasagne products contained as much as 100% horse meat”That’s a lot!

— G.Neville (@GNev2) February 7, 2013

Culinary Suggestion of the Week

Jody Morris, ex-Chelsea and St. Johnstone

Petit Filous with some pink grapefruit!! #absoluteWinner

— jody morris (@morriskid) February 6, 2013

Copy/Paste of the Week

John Aldridge, ex-Liverpool, Oxford United and Tranmere Rovers

Shutting down now hasta mañana

— John Aldridge (@Realaldo474) February 6, 2013

Unexpectedly Regal Closing Sentence of the Week

Stan Collymore, ex-Nottingham Forest, Liverpool and Aston Villa

Good test now for English media &fans.Jack Wilshere is a very good MF in a pool of many good worldwide MF. Temper necessity to deify him.

— Stan Collymore (@StanCollymore) February 6, 2013

Enlightenment of the Week

Sylvain Distin, Everton

People too weak to follow their own dreams will always find a way to discourage yours

— Sylvain Distin (@sylvaind15tin) February 6, 2013

Clash of the Week

Joey Barton, Marseille and Gabriel Zakuani, Peterborough

It really annoys me when footballers start praying on the pitch. Why would a God, if he existed give a shit about the outcome of a match!

— Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) February 6, 2013

My last RT just confirmed what I already knew. @joey7barton is a 1st class knob head

— Gabriel Zakuani (@Gabs50Zakuani) February 7, 2013

Intriguing Accusation of the Week

Neville Southall, ex-Everton and Wales

Decent game tonight Bellamy and bale different classWales played wellAustria better with crossbows than with a ball

— Neville Southall (@NevilleSouthall) February 7, 2013

Entirely Normal-Looking Nutters of the Week

MUTV co-presenters of Dion Dublin, ex-Manchester United, Coventry City and Aston Villa

My 2 Co Presenters on MUTV Thursday Focus #nutters twitter.com/DionDublinsDub…

— Dion Dublin (@DionDublinsDube) February 7, 2013

Get-Up of the Week

Hans Sarpei, ex-Wolfsburg

Mer losse de Dom in Kölle … twitter.com/HansSarpei/sta…

— Hans Sarpei (@HansSarpei) February 7, 2013

Truth of the Week

Robert Earnshaw, Maccabi Tel Aviv

#TheTruth

— Robert Earnshaw (@RobertEarnshaw) February 7, 2013

I’m gona give you some truth

— Robert Earnshaw (@RobertEarnshaw) February 7, 2013

#1~ Serious People do Serious Things #TheTruth

— Robert Earnshaw (@RobertEarnshaw) February 7, 2013

Can’t Handle the Truth of the Week

This guy

@robertearnshaw mind = blown

— James Morris (@jameslovesbdog) February 7, 2013

Dog of a Player of the Week

Dexter, companion to James McArthur, Wigan Athletic

Dexter playing for Scotland tonight ha twitter.com/jamesmcarthur1…

— james mcarthur (@jamesmcarthur16) February 7, 2013

*Sigh* of the Week

Joey Barton, Marseille

I’m off. A little Yeats to ponder whilst I’m absent. ‘The sad, the lonely, the insatiable. To these Old Night shall all her mystery tell’ xx

— Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) February 7, 2013

Football Burp of the Week

Dean Morgan, Wycombe Wanderers

Hahaha I jus had poached eggs & bacon & green tea & some granola & now 3 oranges. BUUUURP ☺

— Dean Morgan (@DeanMorgan) February 5, 2013