Care for our Football Tweets of the Week?
After all, that’s why you’re here…isn’t it?
Splitting Hairs of the Week
Supporters of Romanian side Steaua Bucharest
At Stamford Bridge where there are boos from the away end as the announcer welcomes “our visitors from the Czech Republic”.
— Miguel Delaney (@MiguelDelaney) March 14, 2013
Spoke Too Soon of the Week
Aaron Tshibola, Reading, Tommie Hoban, Watford and Robbie Simpson, Oldham Athletic
Woke up to see Tottenham getting pumped lol
— Aaron Tshibola (@AaronTshibola8) March 14, 2013
Oh when the spurs…looool
— Tommie Hoban (@tommiehoban05) March 14, 2013
Spurs! Hahahahahaha #seasonwillcrumble #again
— Robbie Simpson (@RobbieSimmo) March 14, 2013
Satire of the Week
Gabriel Zakuani, Peterborough United and Kevin Horlock, ex-Manchester City
Spurs have proved everyone right tonight, we all said just like Oscar Pistorius they’d be f*cked without Bale.
— Gabriel Zakuani (@Gabs50Zakuani) March 14, 2013
Buzzing for Arsenal fans tonight they could finally have something to cheer about… #interspurs
— Kevin Horlock (@Kevinhorlock6) March 14, 2013
Not Getting Either of the Week
Gabriel Zakuani, Peterborough United and Kevin Horlock, ex-Manchester City
Can you lot stop mentioning dates when it comes to #SteakAndBJDay my wife thinks its weekly
— Gabriel Zakuani (@Gabs50Zakuani) March 14, 2013
Told the wife I want the steak medium and the blowjob well done…… #steakandblowjobday
— Kevin Horlock (@Kevinhorlock6) March 14, 2013
Self-Deprecating Quip in Response to the Above Kevin Horlock Tweet of the Week
This guy
@kevinhorlock6 mine are generally rare.
— david hughes (@djhughes82) March 14, 2013
Hopeful of the Week
Adrian Forbes, Norwich City Academy coach
So on steak and you know what day I’ve just had a Chinese. Not a good start if you ask me #theresstilltime
— Adrian Forbes (@forbesy7) March 14, 2013
Revealing Analogy of the Week
Wes Foderingham, Swindon Town
This freezing weather is like herpes… Just when you think it’s gone that ish comes back with a vengeance!
— Wes Foderingham (@wes_foderingham) March 11, 2013
OCD of the Week
David James, Bournemouth
OCD is kicking in! Same song, Django, been played for over an hour now! Better go and count my vinyl!
— David James djf (@jamosfoundation) March 14, 2013
Scouting Report of the Week
Ivan Ramis, Wigan Athletic
Spectacular match yesterday’s night. I had not looked at Barcelona at that level.Messi what a player!
— Iván Ramis 21 (@21IvanRamis) March 13, 2013
Ongoing Feud of the Week
Ashley Cole, Chelsea
Why are arsenal fans still going on about that tweet, I done that when i first came on here, I’m bored of that kinda banta now #yawn
— Ashley Cole (@TheRealAC3) March 13, 2013
‘Banter’ of the Week
David Cotterill, Doncaster Rovers
Has anyone found @jordanball1209 first touch today??? The boy is officially having a torrid!!
— David cotterill (@cotterill_david) March 14, 2013
Plug of the Week
Max Rushden, Soccer AM
*corporate tweet* buy all this Golf stuff please: subseventy.co.uk/shop/ *i am not paid for this*
— Max Rushden (@maxrushden) March 14, 2013
Plug of the Week II
Ian Henderson, Rochdale
Get following @stuckuppussyvip my boy is putting a night on in Peterborough.
— Ian Henderson (@hendo2401) March 14, 2013
Alienation of the Week
Luke Dobie, Bristol City, from Ormskirk
Gutted the way nobody in Bristol understands me man, Its as if I’m speaking another language.
— Luke Dobie (@LukeJDobie) March 14, 2013
Forfeit of the Week
Leroy Lita, Sheffield Wednesday (on loan from Swansea City)
Eating pigs belly cos I lost a bet and now I have to do it twitter.com/LeroyLita8/sta…
— Leroy Lita (@LeroyLita8) March 11, 2013
Belly feels horrendous do not eat pigs belly or chicken feet please people
— Leroy Lita (@LeroyLita8) March 11, 2013
“Hey, Isn’t That Sammy Ameobi Rolling Around on a Trolley?” of the Week
Sammy Ameobi, Middlesbrough (on loan from Newcastle United)
Still have that childhood urge to roll around on the big trolleys when I come to Ikea…got some funny looks!
— Samuel Ameobi (@Sammy_Ameobi) March 13, 2013
Unsuccessful Gambler of the Week
Derrick Williams, Aston Villa
Cheltenham can smd
— Derrick Williams (@DerickWilliams_) March 13, 2013
Late Night of the Week
Ibrahima Sonko, Akhisar Belediyespor
Le soleil se leve moi je me couche . Tout sa a cause de J debouze ..My night end here ..French comedy show what a laugh..same when I wake up
— Ibrahima Sonko (@Ibsonko) March 11, 2013
Breath Like Spencer Prior of the Week
Kevin Horlock, ex-Manchester City
Just watched Good Morning and decided to get involved with the Banana and Marmite toastie #neveragain now got a breath like @spencerprior
— Kevin Horlock (@Kevinhorlock6) March 11, 2013
Accolade of the Week
Simon Cox, Nottingham Forest
#NFFC Fans, follow the most hardworking player on the pitch’s fan page!
— Simon Cox FANS (@SimonCoxFans) March 13, 2013
Not a Simon Cox Fan Club Member of the Week
Guy Moussi, Nottingham Forest
@scoxy31real Errrrrr How terrible he looks!!!!!! Ahhahhahahha twitter.com/Guy_Moussi/sta…
— Guy MOUSSI (@Guy_Moussi) March 11, 2013
Prune Enthusiast of the Week
Darren Ward, Swindon Town
Low in fat and high in nutrients? Look no further than Prunes, take a look at my blog bit.ly/ZpKf39 fb.me/2s03K6BqK
— Darren Ward (@DarrenWard18) March 13, 2013
Strange Use of ‘Decent’ of the Week
Carlton Cole, West Ham United
England’s nuts, snowing and raining at the same damn time ! Deeceenttt!
— Carlton Cole (@CarltonCole1) March 13, 2013
Dork of the Week
Carlton Cole, West Ham United
I love my true #tripleF‘s (family, friends and last but not least my Fans) #boom
— Carlton Cole (@CarltonCole1) March 13, 2013
Dork-Baiting of the Week
This guy
@carltoncole1 I thought you were going to say felching
— Les Sim (@Les_WHUFC) March 13, 2013
Unlikely Strike Duo of the Week
Robert Earnshaw and Jay-Z
My friend Jay Z twitter.com/RobertEarnshaw…
— Robert Earnshaw (@RobertEarnshaw) March 13, 2013
Product Review of the Week
John Oster, Barnet
Anybody tried that vita coco drink? Just shows u don’t need to go to Egypt to try camels piss! #rank #dontgetsuckedin
— John Oster (@johnnyost) March 13, 2013
Hilarious Prank Victim of the Week
Shaun Barker, Derby County
I leave the room for a minute and this is what happens to my iPod! I know who it was and I’m surprised! #norespect twitter.com/barks5/status/…
— Shaun Barker (@barks5) March 11, 2013
Mistaken Identity of the Week
Jon Stead, Bristol City
“@liammcclelland: @jonstead9 met you in KFC earlier with the #Huish3rds #BristolCityTwitterFamily” no you didn’t! #hateKFC
— jonathan stead (@jonstead9) March 13, 2013
Warren Barton Retweeted This of the Week
omg we have a pope.i hope hes cool.
— brooklyn aguirre (@brooklynaguirre) March 13, 2013
“Reports of My Demise Have Been Greatly Exaggerated of the Week
Nile Ranger, Newcastle United
Hi @nilepowerranger, just wanted to wish you all the best at Workington Reds. Let me know how Non-League works out for you. #Failure
— G. (@GallowgateView) March 13, 2013
Lool so now I know there is a lot of dumb ass people in this world…. NON LEAGUE LOOOOOOOOL stop it
— Nile ranger (@NilePowerRanger) March 13, 2013
Might sign 4 ma local pub team doe ;)
— Nile ranger (@NilePowerRanger) March 13, 2013
Stream of Consciousness of the Week
Darren O’Dea, Toronto FC
How do u apply 2 become pope? Is it a sort of xfactor ting!? I’d jus love 2 get through to the judges houses! Goin to a stable in bethlehem!
— Darren O’Dea (@odea_darren) March 13, 2013
Crisis of the Week
Geoff Cameron, Stoke City
Anyone ever get that feeling of your ear needing a pop!So annoying!!! Any advice??
— Geoff Cameron (@GeoffCameron) March 13, 2013
Reaction to Pope Installation of the Week
Danny Baker
Fuck. There goes the Falklands.
— Danny Baker (@prodnose) March 13, 2013
Confusion of the Week
Peter Reid
Best pope in the world & best footballer both Argentinians.
— Peter Reid (@reid6peter) March 13, 2013
“@conorflanagan96: @reid6peter There’s only one Pope, so how can he be the best?”One just retired.
— Peter Reid (@reid6peter) March 13, 2013
@reid6peter Exactly, there’s only one…
— Conor Flanagan (@ConorFlanagan96) March 13, 2013
Image of the Week
Curtis Davies, Birmingham City
My lil one decided Ken was gonna be a sunbathing/nudist/peeping Tom LOL twitter.com/thecurtisdavie…
— Curtis Davies (@thecurtisdavies) March 14, 2013
Join us on Monday for our Football Tweets of the Weekend!