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Football Tweets of the Week: Tyldesley, Frimpong, Nando’s, Luiz and more!

Emmanuel Frimpong
Frimpong… Dame Judi (Image: Ronnie Macdonald)

“Tweets of the Week!”

“Eh?”

“Football Tweets of the Week!”

“By Jove, you’re right…”

Multitasking of the Week

Rodney Marsh, ex-Fulham, Manchester City and Queens Park Rangers

I just brushed my teeth & had a pee while showering, listening to radio & thinking about invoices #fivethingsatonce

— Rodney Marsh (@RodneyMarsh10) May 2, 2013

Ticking Off of the Week

Andros Townsend and Jermaine Jenas, QPR, from Rodney Marsh

Superman has entered the building! Have a word with @jjenas8 guys! #rascaltrainers twitter.com/andros_townsen…

— andros townsend(@andros_townsend) April 30, 2013

@andros_townsend @jjenas8 > lol, really funny. If #QPR hadn’t been relegated 48 hours ago it would be even funnier…

— Rodney Marsh (@RodneyMarsh10) April 30, 2013

ITV Tweet of the Week

Chris Morgan, Liverpool physio

#bigmomentsthatITVwouldcuttoadvertsfor“One small step for man..one gi……..”We’ll have to leave it there Neil TOWIES starting”

— Chris Morgan (@ChrisMorgan10) April 30, 2013

Mourinho Tweet of the Week

Nando’s

What’s all this talk about Portugal’s greatest export returning to England?! We never left! ; )

— Nando’s (@NandosUK) April 30, 2013

Utterly Pointless Question of the Week

Alan Sugar, ex-Tottenham Hotspur chairman

I wonder if Jose Mourinho was put in charge of Leyton Orient without a cheque book if he would last a season

— Lord Sugar (@Lord_Sugar) April 30, 2013

“Yes, Probably” of the Week

Rory Loy, ex-Carlisle United and Rangers

Is there a reason Messi isn’t starting or just not playing?

— Rory Loy (@Loyman5) May 1, 2013

“Okay Man, Whatever You Say” of the Week

Emmanuel Frimpong, Fulham (on loan from Arsenal)

Only if arsenal didn’t face bayern what a team they are Thomas muller is a living legend am gonna send a cake to his mums house #Goodnight

— Emmanuel Frimpong (@IAMFRIMPONG26) May 1, 2013

“No, But No Doubt You Had a Good Chuckle to Yourself About It” of the Week

Clive Tyldesley, ITV commentator

Nobody notice aline from Breaking Bad last night?

— Clive Tyldesley (@CliveTyldesley) May 1, 2013

Self Xenophobe of the Week

Robert Huth, German

Get in! 90000 towels will be on the seats of wembley!!!

— robert huth (@robert_huth) May 1, 2013

One-Liner of the Week

Steve Hall, comedian

Champions League. The last time the Germans did something this brutal to the Spanish Picasso did a painting about it.

— Steve Hall (@stevehallcomedy) May 1, 2013

Camp Pose of the Week

David Luiz, Chelsea

twitter.com/DavidLuiz_4/st…

— David Luiz (@DavidLuiz_4) April 30, 2013

And its sole response…

@davidluiz_4 Slut.

— Carefree Chronicles (@CareFreeChronic) April 30, 2013

Hit Nerve of the Week

Joey Barton, Olympique de Marseille (on loan from Queens Park Rangers)

Be warned, anyone correcting spelling or grammar in future to me, will be banished never to return again. Thank You and come again xx

— Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) April 30, 2013

Give me abuse all day, just don’t start that spelling b*llocks or you’ll be toast. No sob stories. No ‘I was only joking’. Nothing. BLOCKED

— Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) April 30, 2013

I really don’t mind the abuse, it won’t get you blocked. If i’m honest I actually enjoy it a little.Spelling/grammar Corrections = expulsion

— Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) April 30, 2013

Barton Troller of the Week

Brian Moore, ex-England rugby union

@joey7barton That should be a small ‘c’.

— Brian Moore (@brianmoore666) April 30, 2013

Joey Barton Troll of the Week

Doing a nasty thing here. Quickly following and then unfollowing some of the grammar knobs, before they are blocked…

— Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) April 30, 2013

Can just imagine the sad twats going, ‘Yes, Barton following me!’ Only to find out seconds later they’ve just been blocked. Haha wankers!

— Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) April 30, 2013

Q&A of the Week

Phil Neville, Everton

“@smithwhufc: @fizzer18 most memorable moment at upton park?”Being called a cu#t

— phil neville18 (@fizzer18) May 2, 2013

Love Doctor of the Week

Kei Kamara, Norwich City

I think of myself as the Date/Love Doctor tomy friends. I love have relationship talks with them and helping them figure their shit out.

— KEI KAMARA (@keikamara) April 29, 2013

Misspelling of the Week

Devante Cole, Manchester City

On the other hand Bayern Munich are unreal Along with dourtmoundEvery1 playing catch up now

— Coley-Cole (@DevanteeeCole) May 1, 2013

Jermaine PedantJermaine Pedant says… ‘Dortmund’.

Typo of the Week

Gary Neville, addict

And for those asking me,its a very good addiction to Sky’s team to have Jamie Carragher.Current, No B******t and knows the game!

— G.Neville (@GNev2) April 30, 2013

Radio DJ of the Week

Marlon Beresford, ex-Burnley and Luton Town

Keeping up the tempo after the soccer with Seasick Steve over on #joolsholland #nice

— marlon beresford (@marlonberesford) April 30, 2013

Seasick Steve, incidentally, is surprisingly popular amongst footballers…

Conor McAleny, Everton

Seasick Steve on Jools here.. Boss!

— Conor McAleny (@CMcAleny) April 30, 2013

Don Hutchison, ex-Everton, Liverpool, Sheffield United, Sunderland and West Ham United

Seasick Steve playing a hub cap#jools

— Don Hutchison (@donhutch4) April 30, 2013

Front Row, Centre of the Week

Andy Carroll, West Ham United (on loan from Liverpool)

Beyonce at the O2 tonight!!!!

— Andy Carroll (@AndyTCarroll) April 30, 2013

Shock of the Week

Terrence Boyd, Rapid Vienna

I dont understand why there are people who seriously dont like #MrBean

— Terrence Boyd (@TBoyd91) April 29, 2013

If Only They Knew They Were Holding Up Titus Bramble of the Week

Vodafone

Any danger in @vodafoneuk technical team picking up the phone. I’ve only been on hold 20 mins

— titus bramble (@19tmb) May 2, 2013

Competition of the Week

Max Rushden, Soccer AM

HUGE GIVEAWAY. Small amount of milk. Send me your address and one lucky winner gets it ALL twitter.com/maxrushden/sta…

— Max Rushden (@maxrushden) May 2, 2013

BANTER! of the Week

Bradley Johnson and Sebastian Bassong, Norwich City

Ha I love the fact tht wen @keikamara was wearing bad gear every1 hammered him on here!! Now @bassongofficiel has done it no1 says nothing

— Bradley Johnson (@Bradley4Johnson) May 2, 2013

Every1 scared off the big bad @bassongofficiel I’ll start it off then….bass your my boy but what you were wearing today was terrible

— Bradley Johnson (@Bradley4Johnson) May 2, 2013

@bradley4johnson ur just an ignorant lol!im giving u a bit of education..im giving u a bit of my culture!!

— Sebastien bassong (@BassongOfficiel) May 2, 2013

BANTER!

Garish Footwear of the Week

Lyle Taylor, Falkirk

I want these new puma boots! twitter.com/lyletaylor29/s…

— Lyle Taylor (@lyletaylor29) April 30, 2013

Could You Actually Imagine? of the Week

Joey Barton, Marseille

You never know, I might actually take some of you up on you’re offers. #bartonsleepingonyourecouch2013

— Joseph Barton (@Joey7Barton) April 30, 2013

Jermaine PedantJermaine Pedant says… ‘Your’.

Priorities of the Week

Don Hutchison

My son asked me a question the other day and I snapped at him “wait a second” I was tweeting a stranger!!!Prioritys . Son comes 1st

— Don Hutchison (@donhutch4) May 1, 2013

Memory of the Week

Terry Horlock and Marc-Vivien Foé, ex-Manchester City

me and the great man himself,not sure what the blindfold is all about #RIPMVF twitter.com/Kevinhorlock6/…

— Kevin Horlock (@Kevinhorlock6) April 30, 2013

…and our Non-Football Tweet of the Week

Watching Men in Black Great movie

— Bobby Davro (@BobbyDavro1) April 30, 2013

Tune in on Monday for our Football Tweets of the Weekend!