Crowd gathers for 'cook-off' that turns out to be a South American nation running a star player into the ground.
Including the final resting place of a former Prime Minister, and a possible cure for Bergkamp's fear of flying.
Almost unbelievably, the best Spain jokes after the current World Cup holders failed to progress past the group stage of Brazil 2014.
"It's like when Radiohead started listening to Boards of Canada and ditched the guitars," said one guy.
A photo of the Chile head shaving initiation as 3 future stars of the international squad were subjected to humiliating haircuts.