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Wenger ins v Wenger outs “now just one violent clash away from religious sectarianism”

Arsenal manager Arsène Wenger
DIVISIVE: Wenger (Image: Gordon Flood)

Proponents and detractors of Arsène Wenger are now so at odds with each other that just one violent clash will propel them into religious sectarianism, experts have warned.

The Frenchman’s Arsenal side had looked to be on an irreversible downwards spiral as they slumped to 6th in the Premier League and were knocked out of the FA Cup by Championship side Nottingham Forest.

Alexis Sánchez leaving for Manchester United looked to have consigned the Gunners to the scrap heap, but now they’re slightly less cut adrift in 6th and are set to sign Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang.

This latest bout of Chuckle Brothers style to-ing and fro-ing has stirred up such adversarial confusion among Arsenal fans that sectarian violence is now believed to be inevitable.

One boffin said: “Positions and resolves harden with every barb that’s exchanged, so it’s frightening to observe what’s unfurling among the Emirates faithful.

“If I was the administrator of an online Arsenal message board right now, I’d be asking myself: am I providing a platform for radicalisation? Extremism? Hate speech?

“People need to realise that Arsenal can finish outside the top four while winning a cup, and that’s fine. It kind of validates and confounds everyone in one fell swoop when that happens.

“So shut up, stop ignoring the other side of the debate and go do some DIY or something.

“Anything that’s more useful than logging onto Arsenal World and calling Essex_Gooner_1973 a nob head.”