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Troy Deeney to face no FA charge for stealing Laurent Koscielny’s lunch money

Watford forward also escapes action over Bellerín noogie.

By Jonny Abrams

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Watford forward Troy Deeney bullied Arsenal
TROUBLE: Troy (Image: Franziska)

Watford forward Troy Deeney will not be punished for stealing Laurent Koscielny’s lunch money during a 2-1 victory over Arsenal on Saturday.

Deeney, who equalised from the spot after coming on as a substitute, will also escape action for giving Héctor Bellerín a noogie in an off-the-ball incident.

Gunners boss Arsène Wenger was left seething by Deeney’s ultimately unpunished bullying, the Frenchman saying “I’ve been left seething [by Deeney’s ultimately unpunished bullying]”.

The incidents did go to a Football Association panel but they were both ruled “too funny to take in any way seriously”.

A member of the panel told Football Burp: “You’ve got to laugh, really, and that mitigates any bad example that Deeney might have set.

“He’s a lovably stereotypical schoolyard bully preying on the feeble, like Nelson from The Simpsons.

“Troy even went ‘ha ha!’ when he gave Mohamed Elneny a wet willy, so we’re inclined to let him off the hook.

“And we can’t very well punish Richarlison for diving, because if Arsenal insist on plumbing the depths then they can’t very well complain if their opponents don snorkels.”