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Sound of West Ham fans’ boos set to reach pitch “sometime in 2023”

0-3 defeat to Brighton not received well by London Stadium faithful.

By Jonny Abrams

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West Ham manager Slaven Bilić
BELEAGUERED: Bilić (Image: joshjdss)

The sound of West Ham supporters booing the 0-3 defeat to Brighton should reach the pitch sometime in 2023, scientists have estimated.

Hammers boss Slaven Bilić was left staring into the abyss after the horrific showing against Chris Hughton’s newly promoted side – and fans made their displeasure known.

However, such is the distance between the stands and the pitch at the London Stadium that the players won’t realise they were being booed unless they’re still first team players in six years’ time.

Even then, say scientists, they’d have to be in the process of playing a match when the sound finally arrives.

One boffin said: “We can’t put an exact time on it but it should be sometime in 2023, according to our dead scientific calculations and algorithms and that.

“It would normally only take a couple of years at that distance, but the bubble-dense air complicates matters significantly.

“The concern for West Ham must be that they’ll be mid-game when it happens – and they might be turning in a performance that doesn’t warrant booing, if you can conceive of such a thing.

“Imagine the confusion it will cause when they go 5-0 up against Man Utd only to be met with a chorus of anguished Cockney booing.

“We urge West Ham United to consider all possibilities and prepare accordingly.”